This Phoenix and Life Coach Wants to Help You Achieve Success
When fans ask me what philosophy in life I believe most I think the answer would have to be, “If it’s broke, burn it.”
But of course, you know that. Everyone at this book signing knows me. As do thousands of other soon-to-be-converts. I’m the world-famous mythical bird and successful life coach. You thought I was a legend? I’m not. I need you to believe in me because that’s the only way you can believe in yourself.
You may have seen me popular films like Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Yet my real story was recorded in my autobiography, Darker Pheonix: The Real Story. It documents my journey out of a life I hated into one that brought me to the peak of fulfillment.
Long ago I was not the fiery confident bird you see today. I was old, tired, ugly, and run-down. In other words, I was you.
Yet, unlike most humans, I decided to change the image I saw in the mirror. I fought my way past internalized prejudices about ugliness, age, drug addiction, and self-loathing. Because of that I literally reached my new potential. How you might ask? Remember my philosophy. If it’s broke, burn it.
Burn the old you. Figuratively if you aren’t a mythical bird. throw away your clothes, job, or anything else you hate. You can change your life! Make yourself younger, healthier, and happier. And once you’re happy, wealth and success will soon follow.
I hear that question in your heads. ”How can we do this, Phoenix?”
Well, I just so happen to be leading a workshop that addresses all of your possible questions.
For a mere $5000 per class you will find true enlightenment for a week at my private mountain resort. There you will learn to let go of what’s been holding you back. And then, you’ll fly.
Please note I’m legally required after a past incident to clarify I mean fly in a metaphorical sense. We don’t want a repeat of 2017.
Now I see the doubt on some of your faces. I know the criticisms of my teaching that you’ve surely read in some so-called “reputable” publications. They say that I’m only successful because I’m a mythical creature who is predisposed to constantly be reborn and therefore never have to worry about mortal quandaries like death, sickness, or institutional oppression. They say that my fame as a healer guarantees I will always have a steady income, and never face an oversaturated market or replacement by a robot.
But I’m here to say that you don’t have to be a magical bird to rise from the ashes! 20 years ago I was addicted to heroin. Now I’m doing yoga with herons.
Many mortals have found the answers they seek at my retreat. Just look at the testimonials in this pamphlet! Definitely don’t google my name and the word “scam” because that will only make doubt my abilities. If you doubt my abilities then my methods won’t work. And really, isn’t that your fault?
Thank you for coming. That’s all the time we have for today. Please take a moment to snap a selfie in front of the shattered golden cage at the door and post it to social media to help me spread the word and to receive a ticket for my monthly raffle. I’ll be giving away a copy of my new book, I Can Only Heal Those That Want to Be Healed. It’s a real page-turner according to qualified lifestyle sites, like Gloop.
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