Welcome to Auntie Mabel Has the Answers. Every week our wonderful holiday romantic expert helps five troubled individuals with their complicated relationship problems.
Dear Auntie Mabel,
This year I decided to try a surefire method of finding my soulmate. I left a personal object in a public place with some clues for how to find me. Don’t worry! I totally let them know I was under 18 so I wouldn’t end up alone with weird creeps. That’s how I met this guy who totally matched my bookish personality. We hated all the same things! Except for one thing…
He despises celebrating Christmas. Who hates Christmas? How can I even deal with this situation?
Must Love Christmas
Dear Must Love Christmas
First before we go any further, have you ASKED him if he celebrates Christmas? I don’t know anything about this man, but I assume you do. That includes his religious preferences. Just a reminder that though you mean well, not everyone celebrates the same holidays as you.
Now, if this person does recognize Christmas but chooses not to honor it, then you’ve got some work to do. On yourself, not him. Remember, Life is long, but the holidays are short.
Dear Auntie Mabel
I’m at the end of my rope with my current partner. We’re engaged to be married and she seems to have cold feet. Lately, she’s been switching places with a woman who nearly identical in appearance to her. Actually switching places! Apparently, she assumed I wouldn’t notice. Does she think so little of me that she would assume I only know her physical form and nothing else? Should I be concerned that this has happened more than once?
More importantly, her switch is inopportune because of my position. To keep my anonymity I can’t reveal much. Suffice it to say, I have access to sensitive government information. By placing a stranger she just met (a foreigner, no less!) in my home she endangers not only our relationship, but my county as well!
What should I do? I don’t have the heart to tell her I can see through the ruse. She’s sensitive about her ability to trick people after a disastrous ventriloquism recital in her youth
Seriously Switched off
Dear Seriously switched off
This is indeed a problem. There is never a good reason to run off without telling your partner. I’m not saying she’s cheating with a handsome man with considerably less power, though statistically she probably is, at least emotionally. However, this may be a sign that your position in society is causing her anxiety. Or, unfortunately, that she is questioning her love for you and needs to explore other options without you knowing.
I wish you had told her how bad she was at tricking others, because now either you keep pretending and risk falling in love with the imposter, or you tell her that you know.
I can’t tell you what to do, as every switching case is different. Follow your heart, let her follow hers. Hopefully, you all end up in a less complicated place where you will never be switched on again.
Dear Auntie Mabel,
I don’t have time to celebrate Christmas. My schedule as a CEO of an extremely profitable company keeps me busy. I will not even allow a holiday work party because it shows weakness and decreases efficiency. Are there no bars? Are there no friend’s houses? Why do my employees, particularly my attractive and quirky secretary, keep trying to change me and turn the office into a party hub?
Too Busy for the Holidays
Dear Too Busy for the Holidays,
There’s more to life than work. Life is calling! Also maybe a very attractive secretary that you should absolutely not explore a relationship with since you are in a position of authority unless they make the first move? Seriously, celebrate. Those who don’t give into the holiday spirit are doomed to come back as ghosts to warn other busy CEOs of their eternal doom.
Dear Auntie Mabel,
My best friend makes me feel terrible about my lack of a love life. So much so that I go home and cry after some of our encounters. Yet yesterday I finally spoke my mind, after YEARS of this behavior, and he shocked me with the truth. He was only making fun of me because he liked me. And he told me I was only annoyed and unable to find love because I liked him. My sister overheard our conversation and called my mom. Now everyone knows and is so happy for us.
But I don’t like him? At least I think I don’t.
He’s really hurt me over the years with his comments. And we argue about nearly everything when it comes to politics, religion, TV shows, culture, and how to squeeze a toothpaste. I’m wondering if, despite all that, I have to give him a chance. Could it be I am simply closing off to my feelings like he says I am?
Your biggest fan,
The Opposite of Attracted
Dear The Opposite of Attracted,
There is a term called “negging” that I must introduce you to. No one gets to tell you who you how you feel, least of all this person who sounds like a nitwit. Find someone who does not make your blood boil all the time because eventually, you have to agree on some things to have a long term relationship.
Dear Auntie Mabel
I met a knight the other evening on my way home. He says he needs to save a lady. I invited him home and now I’m falling in love. But he will need to go back to his own time. Do I go with him? Can I make him stay without causing some kind of time rift? Help!
Anxiously awaiting your aid,
Running Out of Time
Dear Running Out of Time,
You write in every year. I had my producers look you up and I see you live next to a Renaissance Faire. That is a drunk actor in your home. Life isn’t always a fairy tale no matter how much you want it to be. Move somewhere where this constant “knight encounter” will be less of a problem.