#120 All There Is
Janne and I were fans of CNN. We particularly liked Anderson Cooper, this charming journalist who shared news in the way we liked. We watched his broadcasts particularly during our last year in Germany.
I remember when I was doing an internship far from home. Janne and I would be talking often in the phone. When the pope John Paul II died in 2005, Janne followed intensely the election of the new pope via CNN and would tell me by phone what was going on. She became an expert in all Vatican things.
In August of that year, she followed closely the disaster caused by Hurricane Katrina. In my bus and train rides back from work, she would keep me up to date. Again, Anderson Cooper was our measure for any good journalist.
Just about a month after Janne was diagnosed, Cooper released a podcast called “All There Is” focused solely on the topic of grief. As it turns out, he was barely 10 when his dad died. Then, his brother committed suicide at 23. His mother died of cancer at 95. He realized that he hadn’t grieved so while going over family things, he just started recording himself and interviewing others. It’s raw and real.
I started listening to this podcast right away. Janne was still here, but we knew the prognosis was hard. The episode that stuck in my mind was called “Anticipatory Grief”. That’s what I went through for more than a year.
The most recent episode spoke directly to me. He interviews Amanda Petrusich, a writer for The New Yorker, who lost her husband while their daughter was only 13 months old. Everything she said, I’ve been and will be going through.
Then, he shared about something she is doing. She asked close friends and family to write to her daughter about who her father was. She is keeping them in a special box for her daughter when she is old enough to understand. Thanks Amanda and Anderson.
Here is something I’ll ask. If you knew Janne, would you do that for Trevor and Daniel? Pick up a blank piece of paper, your mobile or computer and write about who Janne was for you. It can be a paragraph or a long letter. I will not read them, but will keep everything safe for them. Just take your time.
You’ll help keep Janne alive for them.