#78 Umbrella

I need to hit every single day of the year to find out which ghosts await.

Halloween is an important date for Daniel. Janne would go find one or two pumpkins and spend time with him doing something creative. Trevor doesn’t care much (so it seems). It was also the time when she would pull these two sharp knives that I’m afraid of. Janne slashed her thumbs too many times with them.

One big difference between Janne and I was about timing. Janne, as most regular people, would go on finding a costume for Daniel the week before Halloween. As demand spikes, we would have to be rushing around trying to find what they wanted. In some cases, we had to improvise (we were good at that). This year, Daniel told me he wanted a particular costume. I bought it a month before Halloween. Overcompensating is my middle name.

I went chasing for pumpkins a few days before too. This was my first experience. I didn’t use those sharp knives. Instead, I improvised and used my own tools which were more efficient. Daniel was very engaged. He told me stories about Janne and what she did in past Halloweens.

It was a non-stop rainy day in Tallinn. I fell into despair with such a wet day. Has Daniel not had enough rain falling on his life? When I think I’ve had the worst day since Janne died, then I go through a worse one. I wonder how low this can go.

We took our carved pumpkins outside and lit them. They were looking good although the rain put one candle out. I lit it once more (I’m not giving up).

Then, at seven o’clock, Daniel asked me to help him into his costume. He had a call with a friend from school. They had decided to go trick-or-treating, in spite of the weather. He asked for an umbrella and off he went into the dark. He was knocking on doors and showing off his alien costume for a while. He came back wet, happy, and with a trove of candies. In one house, they told him that they were giving him candy, but that too much candy was bad for him (thanks, empathetic stranger).

Even though it was the hardest day so far for me, it ended at a high point. Daniel taught me to get my emotional umbrella out and go walking into the dark. I’ve met my share of empathetic strangers too.