#93 Dream
I woke up today at 5 a.m. and had trouble falling back asleep. Last night, I watched two movies until 1:30 a.m. This was our habit, late movies and then catch up with our sleep later. I’m just starting to get back in the game. I managed to get back to sleep.
Then I had a dream. Janne was going to meet with a couple of friends. I didn’t know the reason. She didn’t pick me up so I had to find my way there, not so far from home. I saw them inside what was like a big food court (which apparently was my backyard, go figure). When we were leaving, I looked back and thought that this place could fit 100 people and would be great for a party.
Outside, Janne was talking with our friends pointing to a poster. There was an event and they were talking about going. No one told me what was that about. Janne went to a car (not ours) and just started driving. I managed to tell her quickly that she had changed a lot. Janne didn’t take me with her and didn’t tell me anything. I took the phone out, and tried to dial her number, and instead, I ended up calling everyone in my phone book, except Janne. I hung up and woke up. It was 8:30 a.m.
I always had active dreams my whole life. Janne didn’t. Once in Hamburg, she started having lots of bad dreams. I saw a tiny “dream dictionary” in a bookstore so I bought it for her. She couldn’t find what she was dreaming about. I gave her a Guatemalan worry doll that I had. You are supposed to tell her your sorrows or fears. You might want to put her under your pillow. During the night, the doll will solve any problem. They are meant for children, but I’m sure Janne did it by the book. Those dreams eventually stopped.
I know the reason for my dream. I just saw a photo I took of these two friends with Janne during a film festival. This is the poster, the making plans, the secret talk between the three of them. It was typical of Janne to have her own conversations with friends that she kept private as I’m discovering day by day.
The part when she leaves me and I can’t call her doesn’t need a dream psychologist. In my dream, I just wanted to tell her that I’m not upset, but that I will eventually find my way to her (and so will be).
