As a Foreign Woman, I Hated My Life in Japan

Work, work, work

Hakima T A N T R I K A
Japonica Publication

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Photo by Oleg Ivanov on Unsplash

Looking back, it strikes me hard.

I spent nearly a decade in Japan, from 2010 to 2019, chasing dreams, only to realize too late that I let the best years of my life slip away, the years I should have spent building a family. It’s a truth I’m still coming to terms with.

If I could turn back time and warn myself about the sacrifices that came with living in Japan as a foreign woman, I’m certain I’d have chosen otherwise and have a life partner and a family by now.

Now, don’t get me wrong.

I’m incredibly grateful for my time in Japan. It provided me with career opportunities I wouldn’t have had in France and taught me invaluable lessons about adaptability and open-mindedness.

However, no one warned me about the challenges of being a foreign woman in Japan, nor the impact it would have on my chances of finding a life partner.

During my nine years there, I put my love life on hold, conforming to social norms and prioritizing work above all else. Meanwhile, my friends in France were finding balance, prioritizing work-life harmony, and starting families. As a result, they all found partners, while I remained single.

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Hakima T A N T R I K A
Japonica Publication

Scholar-practitioner of Classical Tantra with 15 years' experience, Founder of the School of Quantum Tantra for conscious leaders www.schoolofquantumtantra.com