AMERICA FIRST, SURINAME SECOND (SCRIPT)
Dear mister president,
Welcome to this introduction video about Suriname
The greenest country in the world
No really, It’s great
We were the original owners of New York
But we love you so much, we asked the Dutch and British
to switch our New York with your New York in 1674,
really, it’s true
If it wasn’t for us, you wouldn’t have Las Vegas or Los Angeles or even Disney world, but we love America, we do.
America loves us too, they love us
The American Embassy is the biggest building in Suriname
The biggest, it’s true
Chinese Embassy, smaller, Dutch Embassy, much smaller,
British Embassy, doesn’t even exist, they’re fake
This is Dino Bouterse, our president’s son
He hates terrorists, no really, he does
He loves America, He loves America so much,
he promised to live there for the next 12 years.
This is the Corantine
The river divides Suriname with Guyana
Guyanese are like Mexicans, they take our jobs
So we created a river to keep them out, its huge
And we made them pay for the ferry to cross it.
Nobody is better than letting others pay than Suriname,
This is Coronie, it is our favorite district,
it has coconuts, Lots of coconuts,
you can grab them all, nobody cares, it’s fantastic
They even have a tiny square, Really easy to fill, it’s great
People tell us, very important people,
we make the best drugs in the world, the best
It’s so good, the international police keeps stealing it from us, its true
We have so much, we don’t even know who it belongs to.
This is Canada. They take all our money now.
Our lotto, our gold, they take everything. They do.
We are helping Canada to become great again
But we really want to make America great again
So we totally understand that is America first
But can we just say, Suriname second?
We can make the Dutch pay.
Thanks for watching and lot of hugs
We got the best hugs in Suriname
They’re called brasas, they’re great
*** Editor’s Note: ***
This is a Surinamese response to ‘America First, The Netherlands Second’ video by Zondag met Lubach. It is meant as satire and does not reflect personal views/opinion of the author. We wanted to make a video, but unfortunately, this script was leaked and shared on Facebook. Therefore, the author decided to release the leaked script. Other (edited) versions of this script are not approved, endorsed or linked to the original version of the script and its author.