“One Not Particularly Innocent Dwarf” Game of Thrones Season 8 review: The Bells
The Jokerside review
Episode 8.5: “The Bells” | Directed by: Miguel Sapochnik | Written by David Benioff and D. B. Weiss
Do not adjust your sets. There’s no need — the penultimate episode of Game of Thrones is very well lit. We’re at the unexpected and sudden fall of Pompeii and there isn’t a single amused Queen. So close to the prize, can this season keep up the interest and deliver a fitting end for every character?
*Send in the Maesters — if they can dodge the dragon: A spoiler-filled review.*
AKA: Jon Snow knows something
“I want our baby to live”
Wants. That’s what it’s all about: Wants. Game of Wants. Cersei remembers the horrid, life-crushing prophecy that means her baby cannot possibly survive, but it never stopped her wanting to be Queen Mother. Her Targaryen rival will be heirless, but that can’t stop Daenerys wanting to rule over the Seven Kingdoms, whether it’s through fear or love. We are, after all, in the reign of the ruthless Queens. Neither wanted the war to be over if the other one won. Hell, none of us wanted the war to be over. But now, at last, it is. So there you go.
If only those two Queens had a chat and realised that they had something in common: a shared hatred of Sansa Stark! All the bloodshed might have been avoided… Problem is, there was one other, crucial and unexpectedly influential woman.
Who would have thought Missandei would be the central player in this Song of Fire and Ice? She’s the fuel for the rage that rips through this episode like flame through the battlements of the capital… And it’s a pure and true rage. It rips up Kings Landing and flambées its improbable millions of residents with an efficiency and ruthlessness that makes all other battles in Game of Thrones look like, well, a chess match aboard a train on the English east coast line.
We’re nowhere near the North this episode. We’re in bright, sunny good ol’ London, where there are so many distractions, it’s a wonder anyone even looks up for dragons, until they’re roasted. Apparently, the Golden Company was only shipped in to prove the sheer inconsequence of Cersei’s defense. There was never an opposition; the looming wall of Troy protecting the capital might as well have been made of (putting on out best Ser Barristan voice), cake. And their leader Harry Strickland? He may have been at the front of the line on sea and land, his strong name conjuring up the image of Shakespeare’s Good King Hal, but the elephant in the room proves to be one of the show’s great and hilarious misdirections. Wah, run, whomp.
No, we’re nowhere near the North. Until fear rules and the Northmen get their Dark Ages Dane-inspired sacking on.
Thrones great misdirection
“Mercy is our strength”
Perhaps this penultimate episode is a misdirection so large it’s going to be missed for a while? It’s a bit contrarian in the flurry of outrage that greeted The Bells in the early hours (“Apologise to every parent who named their child Khaleesi!”). But even given this series’ rush to an end, and some of it’s shortening and speed is welcome, aren’t characters just conforming to their real rather than expected types as the net tightens? And anyway, sod the characters — this is a textual subversion in which the characters are merely players! And is the collapse of the city a rush or sleight of hand? I’d opt for the later. The show’s creators are serving up the fresh and surprising, not careering over the canyon.
It’s no mistake that silent Harry is poleaxed by Grey Worm who’s forming an axis of wrathful grief with his Queen over their shared loss, and well over his mid-conflict shock at Winterfell. Poor old stress ball Harry is the lesser of the farewells that we bid to iconic characters in this episode. If they don’t get the redemption many people expected, (puts on gruff voice) they get the redemption the Game required.
Clearing out the spider
“I have known more kings and queens than any man living”.
There are many signs that Weiss and Benioff haven’t lost the plot in the run-in. Before the startling moments of spectacle that follow, the weight of the episode, again helmed by premier action-wrangler Miguel Sapochnik, are those ominous, dark and chilling 12 minutes leading up to a Varys’ roast. The Queen’s Whisperer has whispered his last, and he’s indignant. His switch has added context as the great if not the greatest veteran of the Game. It’s telling he’s lasted so long, but also that his journey as bantering eunuch on high ends here, quietly with few witnesses but an over-abundance of flame. As he softly tells one of his final birds, “The greater the risk, the greater the reward”. It’s not her he’s trying to convince.
The opening scenes work wonders at selling the threat from our newly unpredictable Queen of Dragons: She’s utterly chilling, and as our dark thoughts are led to believe, heading to the unhinged. There’s the realisation and confirmation that she should double-down on her sole reason to live of course, but in seeing Varys stick his neck out too far through futile poison attempts and brazen kingmaking then seeing that, in the pit of her grief, Dany can still out-whisper him, the Queen has never been scarier. As her destined love was raised in the North, and so fails to conjure up any more passion for his Queen — and crucially, impotently, he was properly sucked into the heart of the Game — she whispers, “all right, let it be fear.” That is the confirmation that sets the tone for the episode. Once Jon, Tyrion and more obviously Varys are removed from her thoughts, all surprises are rendered inevitable, even if the ferocity is not.
On the Attack
“I don’t have love here, only fear”
The battle is simple if spectacular fare, hinged on one devastating surprise. That surprise is Dany’s attack run — its dreadfulness, hidden in prior conversation, means destruction unparalleled in Thrones. Before that, it looked like a drawn-out siege. Perhaps a time when a mass raven drop of propaganda could have come in handy — if there are even any ravens left.
Astonishing moment one: the initial dragon attack at 32 minutes, shot from Euron’s point-of-view as the Greyjoy fleet is toasted.
Astonishing moment two: with the devastation of Blackwater Bay miles away — we’re treated to a look at the phenomenal scale of King’s Landing in this episode — Drogon suddenly smashes through the city walls, mirroring the actions of his undead brother the year before. Utterly unexpected, graphic and rather refreshing, things are not going the way we expect. There’ll be no open plain clash of weapons.
Astonishing moment three: Harry buys it in another enthralling tracking shot that kicks off Grey Worm’s mission of rage-filled revenge.
In the Keep, Cersei’s smile fades as her redoubt is overrun. “All we need is one good shot,” the Queen reasons, but all the Scorpions have bolted in those fantastic scenes of a dragon at full power, rendering any man-operated weapon too slow to land a blow.
Astonishing moment four: Tyrion striding through the broken gate. A disenfranchised member of the winning team, his home ruined, and that’s before The Bells twists the knife deeper.
Collateral Damage
“Nothing else matters. Only Us”
Thrones isn’t a show about the common man. Even those who are raised, like Bronn and Gendry, are raised high. The weight of this episode falls on the millions/tens of thousands/make your minds up who one Queen is happy to pile up as human shield and the other is happy to roast to ensure the survivors are enslaved in fear. Or perhaps, each sees no other choice? Hmm…
The insurgent Northern army meets the Lannisters in the streets after a short and sweet dragon-thrashing and the tension is immaculate until the bells prove their pivotal role. Forty-one minutes in, they chime. Chimes that mean different things to different people. For Tyrion, they’re the test between life and death. For Jon, the hardline of bloodshed. For Jaime they’re a failure, one of many on his long descent. For the departed Varys, they’re vindication. For Cersei, the weight of defeat against all her gambles. For Daenerys, the tipping point when fear rules over love. For anyone familiar with The Hunchback of Notre-Dame, they are everything.
Cersei’s eyes close and Dany’s heart boils. Is that pause temporary resistance of inner rage or recall of good advice from her Hand? Either way she’s a woman scorned and the result is the sacking of King’s Landing. It takes a while, but when the long pass toward the Red Keep results in the fire-bombing of innocents it is a truly shocking moment, no matter how many hints or obvious pointers can be picked from previous episodes. In an instant, those chimes turn from being the sound of King’s Landing’s salvation to signalling its utter, destructive subjugation. Nicely done. We see plenty of full, sweeping shots of Drogon, but the majority are from street level — a flutter of wing and a streak of scales between tiled roofs. More importantly, once her decision is made, we barely see Daenerys again, just her power.
Dawning of the North
“You’re worried for her, I admire your empathy”
Finally, Jon Snow knows something — and so does everybody else. In fact, this is the week he knows two things simultaneously. The dawning point for dim-witted Jon Snow comes at 43 minutes. Simultaneously losing authority over his own men and realising that just perhaps, he’s been very wrong indeed. It has to be said that Dany is proved wrong at the same time. When it comes to taking down Southerners, the Northerners are more than happy to follow their Queen and defy their King. This episode doesn’t hold back the effects on the innocent, and it’s most brutally conveyed through Arya Stark. I knew when I spotted Laura Elphinstone she was going to suffer a second successive poor run in prime-time drama. Sadly, Line of Duty transfers don’t work on dragons.
There’s no mistaking the far easier route Arya had through the dead a few weeks ago. That was nothing compared to the dusty challenge of escaping Daenerys’ rage. Having made yet another journey to tick a name from her list, there’s an enjoyable emotion in her departure from the Hound Clegane. In fact, it may be one of this episode’s only uniting factors. From that point, Arya is our main eye-witness to the horror of King’s Landing, her harrowing escape to safety paralleled with Sandor Clegane’s pummelling from his brother. That parallelling isn’t as spot on as Thrones has served up in the past, but it’s powerful. The background of fire and rubble is quite incredible and there are some fine throwbacks to be found in the show’s longest grudge match. There’s a gory recall of the Mountain’s savage take-down of Oberyn Martell, but it mostly works as a fine statement on the futility of revenge. As Arya finally emerges in a desolate city to mount a white horse — whether that’s the steed of the Angel of Death or not — it’s likely that Daenerys Targaryen has replaced the final remaining name on her list: Wilko Johnson — I mean, Ser Ilyn Payne.
The most stupid of the Lannisters
“I am the man who killed Jaime Lannister!”
The Lannister journey covers very little physical ground this week. Tyrion takes a small step into the battered fortress of King’s Landing. Cersei takes some stairs. Jaime can’t muster any attention from the guard he once commanded with the golden hand — the one that had him caught earlier but means little in his former home. But, the emotional end to the twin’s journey is momentous. No family has travelled further. The Bells reduces each to a shell of their former triumphs — if you overlook Jaime’s rogue hand, that represents a complete change of personality for some. But one person’s betrayal is another’s fair cop. Jaime’s battle to the very-near death against Euron is a neat inevitability, even as it stretches credulity. He and his sister ending up buried where they do could never have been anything else. The debt is all paid up and it leaves the game looking a lot clearer.
Question of the Week
“We’re not much for riddles where I’m from”
Things seem predictable now, reassuringly predictable. With our Mad Queen on the Iron Throne, presuming that chamber still exists (because if you thought Winterfell was taking a long time to bounce back in the title sequence, King’s Landing’s going to be a mess next week), will it be Jon Snow standing behind her who repeats Jaime Lannister’s definitive assassination? Perhaps it’ll be one of his sister/cousins? Surely it’s all down to Tyrion if he can take care of that one last bolt of Bronn’s… That is, unless Varys actually managed to send a note (seriously, not seen a raven for an age) and the Hand found his finger jewelry…
Star Turn of the Week
“Yeah, that’s you. That’s what you’ve always been”
It should be Tyrion of course, who risks everything and carries so much of the weight of the major players on his shoulders, but his star will surely shine brighter still next week. He barely steps foot in King’s Landing after all, even when everyone else has gone Assassin’s Creed.
No, the prize goes to Drogon, he of the funny old moniker. Inspired by his Queen’s rage, could there a link between Dany unleashing her true nature and the efficacy of her mount? Whether there is or not, it’s devastating and gloriously unpredictable, turning the spectacle we expected on its head.
This is Pomeiian destruction. That Roman tragedy coincided with the accession of the first Roman emperor to ever follow his biological father to the throne. What does that mean? Oh who knows, dragon attack!
Farewell of the Week
“You think you’ve wanted revenge a long time?”
A fess up from last week, when I predicted: “I can see an ending for Bronn just before Jaime and Cersei’s death, shortly after Qyburn’s bitten it with all the considerable class Anton Lesser can muster, while Clegane’s sitting on the Mountain’s shoulders outside, hammering on his head.” Well, I got the head bit a little bit right.
Who to choose in this deathcart of an episode? The devout martyr Varys? The flawed lions who prove capitalism amounts a tonne of rubble? King’s Landing itself? Somewhere at the Iron Bank, Mark Gatiss is rubbing his hands at the thought of that rebuilding loan.
Each of those losses was iconic, but they weren’t Sandor Clegane iconic. He’s always been a man on one journey, seldom spelled out but always inevitable. Facing off against Ser Gregor, alive or undead, is the only thing that can make him happy. That’s sibling rivalry for you. Whatever happened to their parents?
What’s particularly magnificent about his send-off, from a grateful Arya Stark (“Sandor” — aw) and the background barrage of dragon fire is that he fought his demons to the point it all ended in flames. Special mention for the wonderful send-off meted out to Qyburn. The greatest dashed-brains in King’s Landing carrying its own bit of fine justice. The final undead in the land turning on and killing his creator. You can’t go wrong with a nod to Frankenstein.
Rating: A
“Seems like a fair trade…”
I’m marking this one up because it’s the moment many fans turned on their precious Thrones, and waiddaminute, if rumours are to believed, even the cast? It was always going to be a Game of Just Cannot Win. Some may see their favourite characters shifting to fit a condensed resolution, but the other point of view, mine, is that their fulfilling their true character. Did anyone ever really think that the perfect Queen from the East was going to win in a clean and clear way? Julia Gillard can put her hand down. Both Sansa Stark and Cersei Lannister have revenge in Daenerys’ victory.
This season may be ticking a number of boxes in predictable ways, narrowing the field until a few key players are left, but that’s no bad thing on the way to a satisfying conclusion. Drogon’s wall break proves there are still some surprises to come. Yes, there’s a little too much coincidence, most of it hidden in the spectacle, but Euron Greyjoy’s coincidental arrival at the smugglers cove Davos (the greatest smuggler!) had specially chosen was worth it for his gloating final words.
It isn’t the best scripted or paced episode in the show’s history — too much time is spent away from characters (Jon Snow) while others are left adrift (Ser Davos). But it still manages to wrap up the War of the Seven Kingdoms in 64 minutes and find time for Arya Stark emerge from the apocalypse to meet a white steed like Deckard dreaming up a Unicorn. In here are scenes and shots that will haunt the rest of our televisual days, you can count on that. This is Thrones’ Pompeii and it doesn’t flinch from it. Things have never been greyer and as the last of the Lions, I’ve got a good feeling about a not particularly innocent dwarf.
Whether the future belongs to the bastard, the imp or No One, as the bell tower falls, there isn’t one character who walks away from this episode unscathed.
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