A language that we birthed belongs to us
Tongue is where our mother rolled each syllable to form us
A name of a prayer recited by holy spirits in which a deity served different ancestors before us
Lineage that was apart by ocean lived in your eyes
Where we drifted to find the language to bond us
//
There’s a space in our mind that we keep hidden
A vacuum place where language can’t howled
Yesterday, my parents argued about it in the tongue that they both shared
My mom left alone while my dad ruminated in the space he held for himself
But how it’s translated to us?
Where the language that you spoke already drilled the flesh under my skin,
Loneliness sits between us and I long to be complete
Then tell me, how can I feel whole in the space of your spoken and unspoken words?
//
A space
Both sit in your eyes and the huge chain of gap between our screens
If it’s too early to tell, in each word you typed late at night,
Can I say that I have a good feeling about this?
Although you might hide in the burrow of your room tomorrow
Or you circled back to where we were at first — a stranger —
Since we’re still standing on the edge of a hill
Where I hold onto a rope with my veins tightened
And a fog seeped, I can’t see yours
Blind and afraid,
Would you tell me if someday you’ll leave?
//
I hate this feeling where I misspelled each sign you penetrated
I’m dyslexic about your words and your actions
Sluggish heart of mine, already bruised and still bleeding from the last war
She can’t handle any wounds more than what she has now
If all of these only happen in my head,
Would you kindly let her rest before you try to break her again?
//
How much a person can get into another person — deeply?
Is it listening to your lullaby enough to know what you dreamed last night?
The nightmare that kept you awake all night
A demon that resurfaces while you had yourself unguarded
Tell me about your abstract thoughts
Or the darkest hell that you’ve gone through
Tell me in the language that I don’t speak
Elaborate it in the form that warmed you
Because dear,
Language transforms each day in a way we want to be understood
Let it transcend at the time when we are born
As two different souls who found a nest in each other’s misinterpretations
Willingly to form another language that could define us
A language only belongs to us.