Nora Seed & Her Multiple Lives: Matt Haig’s The Midnight Library

The imbalance of a hundred life chances and one life attempt.

Photo by Jack B on Unsplash

Back in 2021, I found an interesting book recommended by the homepage of a book website. It’s Matt Haig’s piece of work, titled “The Midnight Library”. I feel curious after I read the synopsis, so I spare my time to read it. It took a month for me to finish the book, I started reading it around August until September 2021.

At first, I was kind of having a hard time to understand Matt’s choice of vocabulary. But as time goes by, I’m getting used to it. The ambience I feel every time I read it is like a melancholy, gloomy day. As if standing in a room with dim lights.

Long story short, this fantasy novel presents a woman named Nora Seed who lived in Bedford, England. According to what I read, she gave up her life cause everything within it doesn’t work out for her. She lost her job, divorced her partner. She blamed herself and regret everything that happened in her life, until she decided to end it.

This is where the intriguing part begins. The time she attempted a suicide, she’s not confronted by Heaven or Hell but found herself in a library with the endless bookshelves. The shelves goes on and on with limitless books.

The shelves were filled with books, contained every life that Nora could have lived when she’s still alive. So every time she picks up one of the books, she will dive into it and live the life she chose. One thing I notice about the way she choose a certain book is that she will put anyone else first before her.

So every book that she picked will tell a story of how she might have been if she did something different for anyone but her. I viewed that her character has blamed herself all her life, that’s why she tried to pay it by living through those books she chose. Even though she knows that she won’t be long there.

I highlighted some quotes of the book, by the way.

This part makes me think that we’re yearned for human connection cause that’s the only way for us to be more humane.

This whole part went straight to my heart.

This part is where Mrs. Elm told Nora to go back to her life cause she almost run out of time.

This part is what I meant by her putting anyone else first before her.

The idea to live multiple lives as Nora did make me wonder if there’s any chance to do it in the real universe. As a mankind, we only have one chance in a lifetime to live the life that God gave to us. But unfortunately, God didn’t give us a chance to choose which universe we will live in.

Sometimes I found myself wondering of all the what-ifs and those moments in life where I could’ve done it differently, I really want to know what place it would lead me. Not only that, I also found myself thinking that it’s not fair by having a chance to only live once in an extensive world. This world is vast enough yet we don’t have much time and chance to explore it with this tiny body.

I always try to understand and being enough by what God has given to me. But still, I sometimes feel guilty of those chances I didn’t take when I had the chance. I wish I could’ve done everything differently.

It leads me to realize that twenty four hours a day is not enough. The world evolves a little too fast, yet it takes me so much effort and time to decide a thing. I really wish that everything’s being slowed down, everyone’s not in a rush.

I wish the world could stop evolving for a minute so I could live in certain moments a little longer. I wish there were forty eight hours in a day, so I could live the same day twice. So I won’t miss a thing.

But for now, I hope the feeling of being enough by everything I have is more than anything.