The Quarter-Life Reflection
I breathe every single day, grateful for that simple fact. Yet, I don’t feel like I truly live in the present. I just keep going, day after day, living the same monotonous routine without doing much of significance. Maybe that’s why everything feels like it’s happening so fast. Suddenly, I’m celebrating my 24th birthday, it seems like just yesterday I was celebrating my 19th. Now, I’m closer to 30 than to 17.
As I grow older, I feel like I’m running out of time. My perfect lifetime plan seems more and more out of reach. I used to be someone with dreams, but now they feel distant and impossible.
Wasn’t I supposed to publish my first book by 24?
Wasn’t I supposed to get my master’s degree by 25?
Wasn’t I supposed to get married by 26?
Wasn’t I supposed to buy a house by 27?
I guess this is what they call a “quarter-life crisis.” Constantly worrying about the future, feeling like I’m never enough, downplaying my achievements, endlessly comparing myself to others. Trying everything but still feeling like I haven’t found what’s right for me. It’s exhausting.
I’ve tried reading self-help books, hoping for guidance in this “adulting” thing, but they haven’t helped much. I still live with worry, constantly comparing myself to others. I still feel like I’m standing still while everyone else is running. I still feel lost.
One day, I talked to my older sister about this unsettled feeling, and she said, “What you feel right now is normal. I felt the same way at your age. Remember, in life, there are things that are enough to just go through without overthinking them.”
Somehow, those simple words helped me. There are things that are enough to just go through. The fact that I decide to live and show up every single day should be enough for now, right? The fact that I keep trying, keep going no matter how tiring it is, is good enough, right?
I also remember reading something that said, “Life is not a race, it’s a journey. Enjoy it, because all timelines are unique for every person.”
Maybe this age is a time to discover what I truly want in life.
Maybe this “lost” moment will lead me to “find” myself.
At least, I hope so. For now, I’m learning to be patient with myself, to embrace the journey, and to trust that everything will fall into place in its own time.
