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THOUGHTS
Love Is Not Just In Your Feelings
Are you ready to commit?
When I see two people highly enamored in love, I often ask this question out of curiosity, “How do you know that you love this person?” I find it amusing that all of them reply in the same manner.
“It’s the feelings that I can’t get rid of.” For sure, emotions in love are one of the greatest elements that can sustain your love life, but are they just feelings? What will you do when you get used to each other and these feelings subside?
According to Gary Chapman, the author of the famous “Five Love Languages”, the “in-love” period only lasts up to a few months to a few years. Afterwards, you’re no longer bound by the feelings, and you end up in a long relationship you no longer feel like being in.
Understanding this will save you a lot of time, as sometimes we confuse limerence with love, attraction with love, and simple politeness and kindness by others with love, leading to heartbreaks and the wastage of time over something temporary.
For sure, love is not merely some emotions; it is a set of emotions and behaviors that involve daily choices to proceed, even if your feelings don’t support it, even if your mood is low, and even if the honeymoon period is over.