Making Friends like Leonardo DiCaprio
Even If You Are 25 And Older
Making friends is hard. We are all social creatures, we all on some level require the company of others, no one makes it through life happy and alone. There may be sometimes where you prefer it, but everyone needs advice or help or even to be needed. A singular existence is a useless existence. When we are young making friends is easy, at some point it just kinda happens that you have friends. Your mom may set up a playdate for you and another kid and there you go, there’s your first friend. But as we get older making friends is more complex, what does this person believe? Are they going to get along with my other friends? Are they going to drain me of energy with their incessant drama and complaining? Making friends as an adult is hard but thankfully Leonardo Decaprio has the answer for us.
“When I want someone to be my friend, I just make them my friend.” -Leonardo DeCaprio
Leonardo Decaprio has been in Hollywood for a while, and with that comes some weird twists of personality. Look at his dating record, kinda icky right? Thankfully Leo’s solution does not lie in his romantic escapades. It lies in his relationship with our friendly neighborhood Spiderman. Toby Macguire and Leo have been best friends for 36 years and the origin of their connection is what we are examining here. Apparently, Leo was the instigator of the relationship. He saw Toby walking down the street, and recognized him from an audition they were both at. He jumped out of the car and ran up to him, making a full effort to show Toby his interest in becoming friends, the rest is history.
How To
What can we pull away from this short parable? If you want a friend, then they are yours to earn. So many people think that a winning personality and a smile is all it takes to make friends, but in the busy, distractable world we live in today that sadly just isn’t the case. To gain friends, you need to pursue friends. The easiest way to pursue friends is to be honest and open about your intentions, “hey you seem laid back and funny, I want to be friends with you.” say something like that and you’ve created a magnet between you and your new pal. If you’re like me, then you really enjoy poking fun at your friends when they do something stupid. I have learned to supplement my offenses with making sure my friends know they are my friends. People love to hear that they are your friends, it solidifies their own feelings about you, no one wants to be in a one sided relationship, show them that they aren’t by proving your loyalty to them verbally. Telling people that you want to be their friend and pursuing them to that end will force them to do the same.
This is also a great way to maintain healthy relationships, having an attitude of intention within your social circles keeps the people around you doing the same, if people feel that you want the best for them and are in their corner no matter what, then it frees them of their usual self preserving worries and allows them to do the same for you.
Caveats
Don’t go around using this trick trying to build a cult following, that won’t work and it will seem manipulative, this trick is best paired with intentional actions to become closer with that person.
I personally don’t see this as an activity that takes extra confidence, be sure of your feelings about the people around you and just change your verbage to assure their standing in your eyes. Confirm to those that you want to keep around that you are in it for the long haul, make sure they know that you want them by your side during the big events in your life. When you make it big and have all the fame and fortune make sure they understand that you want the same for them.
Making friends is scary, adults always have a thousand things going on, but if you take a pause from the hustle and bustle and stop to truly appreciate your social network then your friends will do the same for you. Take a minute to figure out who of your best friends has a birthday coming up, write them a quick paragraph about their strengths and the ways that they improve your life. Trust me they will cherish it forever. Just make sure you title it “to my best friend, so and so.” Just like Leo would.
