Asking This One Question Can Unlock A World of Difference

I recently read a fascinating book called Switch: How to Change Things When Change is Hard (by the Chip Heath and Dan Heath). The book is easy to read and has lots of great tools to help make change happen. One is particularly relevant to coaching situations — it’s called The Miracle Question and is used in Solution-Focused Therapy.

When dealing with a difficult problem, we would ask the question as follows: “Can I ask you a sort of strange question? Suppose that you go to bed tonight and sleep well. Sometime, in the middle of the night while you are sleeping, a miracle happens and [the problem we are discussing] is resolved. When you wake up in the morning, what’s the first small sign that would make you think, ‘well, something must have happened, the problem is gone!’?”

The question gets the person to think about the bright spots, the areas where things are actually going well. You then follow up for specifics, tangible signs that the miracle has happened.

For example, imagine I were working with a business owner that had a problem employee. When she answers the Miracle Question, she would think of situations where the employee is actually doing a good job, the bright spots. We would then discuss what is different in those situations than in the cases where the employee isn’t doing well. We would likely find some specific things that could be generalized to those other situations.

Another example: I have a client who frequently fights with his wife. The Miracle Question helped him realize that when he’s nice to her, they fight less. I know, shocker! But the fact is, he didn’t realize that until the Miracle Question made him look for the bright spots in their relationship.

Are you dealing with a difficult problem? Ask yourself the Miracle Question — the results may surprise you!

Originally published at bureauwest.com on July 22, 2018.