How Wishing is Ruining Your Life
And what you should do instead.
In my house, we have a phrase that goes like this: “Wish in one hand and shit in the other. See which one fills up first.”
This may seem kind of crass, but it’s just a more colorful way of saying that wishes don’t really get you anywhere. You can wish for more money, or wish you had a loving partner, or wish for a more fulfilling life. We all wish for the greener grass from time to time, and that is perfectly natural. No matter where we are in life, we always seem to want more.
This isn’t all bad. Having a goal for your future is wonderful, and I personally believe the more obnoxious your goal is the better! Go for the crazy dreams that scare you and make your heart skip a beat. Envision what life could be like if you achieved your goals, and then realize this: If you really want to achieve these audacious goals, and not just wish for this future life, you need to take action!
This can be a challenge because it may seem like the goal is so far away, and therefore impossible to reach. You might think: “If I get winded going up a flight of stairs, how could I possibly run a marathon?” Apply that analogy to whatever mountain you want to climb, but you know the answer already.
You get there one step at a time.
Anyone who has achieved anything significant does so by starting at the beginning. They take small steps at first to build up strength and resilience. They don’t give up when they feel like they’ve failed. They keep moving forward no matter what the circumstances are.
Plan. Execute. Learn. Repeat.
Wishing, on the other hand, only leaves you feeling hopeless. Wishing makes you powerless and in a state of envy toward others. These negative feelings can also lead to self-deprecation, depression, and anxiety. When you don’t feel like you are in control, you feel like you will always be stuck as a smaller version of yourself, and that others just seem to be better at life than you are.
This couldn’t be further from the truth. You are in control. You have the ability to take action today. Even if it’s small. Even if nobody around you notices. You will notice, and you will stop wishing. You will start taking action.
It will feel amazing. And you will feel powerful. I’d be willing to bet on it.
Originally published at https://www.jillvh.com on November 2, 2019.
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