Stop throwing your money at online courses and coaches: no one gives a shit about you!
To give advice to a man who asks what to do with his life implies something very close to egomania. To presume to point a man to the right and ultimate goal — to point with a trembling finger in the RIGHT direction is something only a fool would take upon himself. — Hunter S. Thompson
You are a normal functioning human being, that is probably asking some questions. Totally randomly you stumbled upon one website and got interested in the discussion that was happening about a specific topic. It was exactly describing how you were feeling. It was so relieving to see that someone else felt the same way you feel now. After you continue scanning the articles in this website you start thinking that this guy fixed all his problems. Wow! You start admiring him and decide to follow. The discussion is so engaging that you see hope: if he did it, you can do it! You buy products/books/coaching but it doesn’t feel you are solving the problem: it feels more like the problems are increasing and you feel like shit!
There is a legend in the web that there are some people which figure everything out of life. They are incredible geniuses that went through their hero’s journey and learned everything out of life. They are surrounded by an aura of perfection. Their followers are somehow striving to get where their leaders are. After buying their courses and trying their method, they feel stuck. The can’t do what those gurus claim is possible and easy. They go through a lot of pain, trying to buy courses and figure out what to do. They feel useless and flowed.
Those gurus call themselves Rockstars, Ninjas, Founders, Coaches, Entrepreneurs. They ask you to follow them, to take their courses, because they know something you won’t be able to figure out.All this myth does is to prevent people from learning and grow as people, trying to understand things. Most of the stuff you read it is created and crafted to grab your attention and make you want to buy those products. I’ve been tricked so many times.
In the Age of the Image, anyone who wishes to grab our attention and to hold it does so by converting himself into a “human-interest story,” translating his life into a kind of fable….
Those who long to be entrusted with real consequences in our lives acquire that power increasingly by presenting themselves as fairy tales. — Pico Yver
But why am I telling you this? I’m pretty sure you knew or you had a gut feeling about it.
Life is a constant field of mistakes. Do them in your own way! There are people that keep doing them, and people that keep doing them. Nobody is perfect and avoid all the mistakes. The gurus usually make all of them and try to sell you a solution. But there is no solution: the only way to learn something is by doing it, not reading about it. That’s the truth that nobody wants to say!
I loved the way Robert Greene answered Navid Moazzez about paying for mentorship.
Be careful about that … a mentor-apprentice relationship is a personal emotional one on one relationship. With a coach you are always wondering: are they there to make money or to help me? … There has to be a give and take relationship where both are getting something out of it, not just money
If someone is giving you a method to fix everything which they believe solves your problems, think about it twice before buying it. Why? The proven methods or the 10 easy steps to follow exactly as they are planned don’t work. They don’t work because it’s not you!
What works are general concepts, frameworks. Frameworks are structures that contain your ideas and they don’t have a fixed shape: the shape changes through your experiences. To build your framework you just have to think of some generic simple principles and stick to them.
Most of the information you are buying is simply common sense, publicly available information that are easy to find on the web. You pay for the new package and the pretty image cover, nothing else!
Teachers preach that if you do like they did and failed as they did, you’ll be successful as they are. People don’t learn in the same way. Learning styles on Wikipedia.
You should be encouraged to learn by doing things the way you want and fail. Success is behind the fears you are feeling and you already know. You learn by people that ask you amazing questions, not from those that give you “secret and privately baked answers”. That is not the right way to invest in yourself or your business. Don’t believe that if you put enough effort following these concepts you will live an amazing perfect life achieving your dreams. You are buying an illusion to feel better about yourself.
Measure life and get feedback out of it as fast as possible.
Have you tested your ideas? Did you get feedback? Are you practicing every day? That’s how you get good. Forget about coaches, products and courses. They are there only try to suck your money. Nobody cares about you… that’s why you don’t feel you are growing: you are investing too much in other people.
Stop buying their step by step guide to success/love/sex/happiness/money. Create your own. Experiment. Enjoy your amazing life. If you just want to rely on a 10 easy steps list or step-by-step product it’s just because you are too lazy to move your ass on your own: what you are paying for is a kick in your butt, nothing else.
