I
A Poem
Two almost three deaths in a week I
came to write about the stars to gaze at the stars
not be pummeled by them
not have them laugh at me and glare I
came to find peace not to mourn endlessly I came
to study and learn and reflect in wonder
I came to feel like I have a home in it all I came to
belong and belong and belong
And I find oh I find that some don’t want me
I find that some don’t care or understand
and that somehow this is fine for them to do to gossip and judge
dismiss and trivialize when I came
to give gifts and to glow
I came to question and to know
I do not have time to struggle with others
in their boxes for me
I do not have time to play high school games
to be that wallflower waiting for a chance to dance
I came to let my heart explode
with the joy if my own self
to fill my own self with what pleases
my soul with what makes my soul feel
