The Clock on the Wall

“Are we ever going to change the battery in the clock?”

“I don’t know, time is relative.”

I’m pretty lazy when it comes to most things in life. There’s a battery powered clock on the wall of our living room that has been dead for about three weeks. My wife and I look are locked into the ultimate stalemate over the clock. Who will break first?

Changing the battery is too much work. I’d have to go to the garage and get a new battery. Get a chair to stand on from the dining table. Take the clock down. Replace the battery. Reset the clock. Rehang the clock. Make sure it’s straight. Put the chair away. That’s a lot of steps and like, five whole minutes of very precious time.

Besides, is it really that important to know what time it is? I mean, I haven’t been late to anything yet.

That I know of.

As I walked into my office at work today I realized the clock on my wall has been dead for approximately two months, three days, and seventeen hours. I know this because the clock also keeps track of the date and, well, I did a little math.

This clock is much easier to change, considering it sits just above my desk. But getting a battery would be very time consuming. They’re kept on another floor. In a locked room. It’s kind of a pain.

Instead of changing the battery I’ll just write about why I don’t want to change the battery. This way is more cathartic.

Besides, this weekend I’ll just have to change it again anyway. Why not just wait it out? This way I only change the clock once instead of wasting valuable time twice.

Like I said before, time is relative.

Justin Cox tells stories and eats donuts. Follow him on Twitter or buy him a donut. More stories at JustinCox.com.