Lessons from Mindfulness
Mindfulness
finding peace in a frantic world is an excellent book for people interested in
getting started with mindfulness practice. I did already practice meditation
daily for more than a year so I didn’t follow the entire structured program but
rather complemented my practice. So either way you will benefit from this book.
The book
wants to help you leading a happy and joyful existence by using techniques of
Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy. This program is developed by Oxford
professor Mark Williams and his colleagues. Here are some things I learned from
this book. Some things or most of them all of us likely experienced at some
point in our lives.
You
can’t always think yourself out of every problem
Most of us function on autopilot during most of the time of
the day. We get so used to our daily routines and our habits that we don’t pay
attention to details. Psychologist Daniel Simons did several experiments on
this. In one experiment he had an actor stopping ordinary people on the streets
and ask them for directions. While that was happening, two people carried a
door rudely barged between the actor and
the test person. The moment the view of the actor was blocked by the door;
the actor was switched with another. The new actor looked totally different,
his outfit was of a different style and color, and he sounded different. Yet
only around half the people questioned actually noticed the switch. This is
just one example of how little mindful most of us are.
The autopilot has its use, it helps us free up mental
resources. But this accumulation of automatic behavior can easily grow out of
control. That’s where mindfulness comes into play. Mindfulness is there to
notice what is happening. By being more mindful we can break out of negative
patterns and focus on what matters.
When our autopilot becomes overloaded with too many
thoughts, memories, anxieties and tasks, it is easy to become overwhelmed and
chronically dissatisfied with life. At this point it is difficult to think our
way out of the problem. Thinking is like opening yet another program on an
overloaded computer. Instead, we need to step outside the cycle almost as soon
as we notice it’s begun. That is an important step to learn to deal with life
more skillfully.
None of us can control what thoughts rampage through our minds, but we do have some control over how we relate to them.
Any difficulties that arise in your meditation practice,
you can view them as allies
One of the best lessons I learned for my meditation came
from the book Sit
like a buddha. I used to get very frustrated if I wasn’t able to get a “perfect”
or “good” meditation session. I’m sure everyone that tried to meditate can
relate to the feeling you get if your thoughts just keep exploding while you
try to imitate a monk like you know from those pics on the Internet, lol. Sit
like a Buddha thought me to see that frustration as ally. Truth is, it is the
perfect opportunity to train self-kindness.
Any mind-wandering, restlessness or boredom that arises can be acknowledged as allies of your attention training.
Once you learn that every meditation session is a success,
your practice will radically improve. You can’t do it wrong, that’s the amazing
realization. You’ll start looking forward to every session and in time, you
will enjoy your practice, not only the benefits that come with it.
The aim of meditation is not to control the mind any more than it is to clear it. These are happy by-products of meditation, not the aims.
The rumor mill
Often we interpret the world in a non-beneficial way. We
think things are bad when in reality, most of the negativity comes from our own
constant internal commentary on the events we encounter.
We think the situation itself aroused our feelings and emotions when, in fact, it was our interpretation of the scene that did this.
Our commentary happens so fast and is so automatic that we
seldom even question or notice it. That commentary is the rumor mill. Trying to
fight our commentary is not very productive as you may have noticed.
Instead of confronting the mind’s rumor mill with logic and “positive thinking,” it makes far more sense to step outside the endless cycle and just watch the thoughts unfold in all their fevered beauty.
I know that there are many rumors on the internet or any
news source, so naturally when I read something, I don’t automatically give
much importance to it. So why should it be any different with the rumors of my
mind?
When you get distracted while meditating, just focus on your
breath again, that is essentially what the practice consists of. An experienced
meditator is not someone whose mind does not wander, but one who gets very used
to beginning again.
Meditation is a simple practice that gains its power from repetition.
Productivity and meditation
I’ve noticed that after days of a lot of meditation, my
productivity was much higher the next day. I’m just much more present which
enables me to “be in the zone” in whatever activity I participate in. Studies
found similar things. We think that if we rush through the day, we will get a
lot of things done but this is far from the truth. This was just a side-note
not taken from the book.
Taking the gas out of the aversion system
We often try to avoid difficult emotions and thoughts, but
what if we would just observe them? Studies have shown that if meditation
practitioners just left them on their mental workbench, soon their relationship
to these emotions changed. They took the steam out of the spiral by avoiding
the mental aversion system from kicking in. Whenever you are stressed up about
something try this next time, just let the emotion or thought be whatever it
is, don’t try to change it or push it away. See what happens.
Overgeneral memory
makes see things incorrectly
Researcher have found that if we experienced traumatic
events in the past, or if we are depressed or exhausted, our memory tends to
work differently. Instead of retrieving specific events, our memory retrieves a
summary of events instead. That’s what psychologists call overgeneral memory.
Our worldview may get progressively black and white. We think that everything
is just always screwed. If you ever find yourself in such a situation, remember
this. Research has found that just eight weeks of mindfulness training makes
memory more specific and less overgeneral. Imagine if you maintain a constant
practice beyond just eight weeks!
How to better deal with difficult emotions
It can be very difficult to take action and do the things
you want if you are in a bad mood. Taking time to rebalance your life can help
you see negative thoughts as mental propaganda that prevents you from at least
testing if the propaganda is true or not.
Usually we are motivated to do something, then we do it. But when our mood is low we have to do something before the motivation comes. Put action first, and see how your motivations change after a while.
You could do something pleasurable, or something that gives
you satisfaction and a sense of accomplishment. Or you could just practice
being mindful.
Tiny actions can fundamentally alter your relationship to the world for the better.
Originally published at Karlbooklover.
