6 crazy facts about Christmas that’ll make you shit your pants

When your friends and relatives are gathered around this holiday season, be prepared to knock their socks off with these amazing, little-known trivia facts about Christmas.

1. Origin of the name

The word Christmas is derived from the old Germanic words Ch meaning “the day” and Ristmas which means “after Christmas Eve.”

2. Christmas has not always been so widely accepted as it is today

In 2012, Woodrow Wilson was the the first president to celebrate Christmas at the White House. President Wilson’s wife, Ashley, was unable to attend the festivities because the bus was late.

Back in my day, we only got a piece of wood for Christmas and we were happy with that. (Photo: White House)

3. Starbucks holiday cups

As an annual tradition, Starbucks introduces a new festive holiday cup design with the sole intention of infuriating Christians who know that Jesus is easily insulted by coffee cups. Bonus trivia fact: Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz takes his coffee black, like Jesus.

4. Increased suicide rates

A rise in suicide rates during the holidays is often attributed to loneliness, but multiple studies have shown that self-inflicted death is most often brought on by continued exposure Christmas music. It’s everywhere. I just want a coffee. Can’t I buy anything without Mariah Carey squealing in the background? I can’t take it anymore. Feed my dog. I’m sorry. Goodbye, cruel world.

Stop the insanity (Photo: PBS)

5. Christmas trees

More than 80% of Christmas trees sold each year in the US are equipped with tiny cameras. They see you when you’re sleeping. They know when you’re awake.

6. Santa Claus

When the real Santa Claus died in November 1987 at age 433, his son Dan took over the family business.

“Hold still, ya little shit.” (Photo: White House)

Originally published in K Composite Magazine at kcomposite.com

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