FAMILY AND CULTURE — TO BE OR NOT TO BE.
Over the years culture and family values may have been changed, criticized,
replaced, or all together eroded. I have always been confused, to be honest. We want traditions but at the same time frown upon them. We want a modern-day family but we miss our culture. As a lady who was born between the millennials and the Generation Z, I have to say I almost feel like creating my own culture that my future family will live by. Because to be honest, our culture and heritage as Africans and as Kenyans are very beautiful but the modern society has given women a voice and power, I’ll be forever
grateful for that for sure. Yet at the same time, it has eroded our traditional family values.
Both sides have their advantages and disadvantages for sure, but how do I balance them? How can I be a revered career woman and be the best wife and mother? I want to have a house manager but does that make me a lazy wife or a bad mother? I want to run my own company that will be known for its efficiency and smart work, to achieve that I feel like a few traditional values will be thrown out the window.
I love my melanin and my wool-like hair, I love that I can cook both modern and traditional food. I love that my parents talk to me in my mother tongue and even though I’m not very good at it, I’m still proud. Sooner or later I always feel an impending doom of having to choose one path or the other.
Can I create my own culture though? One that I learn from the traditional and the modern and create the best of both worlds?
Some will say this is hypocritical. The judgment will be harsh, I know, but I don’t know what to do. Follow the traditional ways and maybe give up my voice and power, follow the modern way and give up my roots and heritage. I don’t want the next generation to grow up without knowledge of their roots but I don’t want my daughter to grow up without a voice.
Change is surely inevitable, but I wonder will we lose our heritage and traditions completely in search of equality, voice, and power. Will we forget about Ubuntu all together, or can we create a new culture that meets both wants and needs?
By Carolyne Ngugi.
