The West Wing Revisited: We need to talk about “The Jackal”
Welcome back to Kheiro’s West Wing recaps, where stuff just happens because Sorkin says so
In screenwriting, there is one guiding principal: show, don’t tell. It is a rule Sorkin has not, and will never, learn. The reason Studio 60 On the Sunset Strip died an ignoble death was because Sorkin told the audience that the sketches were brilliant and scathing satire, then showed them they were…Gilbert & Sullivan parodies. In this episode (S1E18, “Six Meetings Before Lunch”), every single principal character on The West Wing talks about CJ doing “The Jackal.” We are told and told and told and told. Then we are shown, and it’s fine. CJ lip syncs to a jazz/hip-hop thing. Would she survive on Drag Race? No. It’s not even what I would consider a tour de force party trick, but I know every word to Salt n Pepa’s “Shoop.” But everyone’s drunk and it’s pleasant. Then we are told about it some more, like three scenes after it happened. Why? And why do we need to see Sam try and throw gang signs during “The Jackal” in an episode where our heroes argue for school vouchers and against reparations? It’s not a good look.
CJ performs “The Jackal” in celebration of Mendoza’s Supreme Court appointment finally being approved by the Senate. Toby confiscates everyone’s champagne until they get at least 51 votes, because he doesn’t want to “tempt fate.” It is adorable.
The next morning, Toby is practically bubbly — this great weight of Mendoza’s appointment has been lifted from him and he can finally fly! He says hi to coworkers and asks how they are. His coworkers find this unnerving. He tells Margaret to turn her frown upside-down, which is frankly disgusting. Only an impromptu panda meeting can bring him down.
The episode is called “Six Meetings Before Lunch,” so we should probably break down what those meetings are.
- Mandy tries to convince Toby that getting new pandas for the DC zoo is a good idea
- Josh tries to convince a black civil rights lawyer that reparations are a bad idea
- Sam tries to convince a public school teacher that school vouchers are a good idea
- CJ meets with Zoey about a press ambush she experienced
- The Secret Service meet to narrow down which of our fair nation’s many white supremacists are looking to murder Zoey
- CJ meets with the president about Zoey
Half of these meetings are about Zoey, who is having a helluva morning. She went to a frat party where her friend David Arbor was arrested for possession. At her school dining hall, Zoey is ambushed by a Drudge Report-type motherfucker who asks her what she thinks it says about the country that “the President’s daughter is partying with drug dealers?” Cute. Way to yell at a teen, you sad little paparazzo. He gets roughed up by Gina, which is mildly satisfying.
This storyline is so pre-Instagram it hurts. Zoey gets to go to a frat party, which is something that could never happen today. I’ve heard that Disney stars and other teens that need to appear wholesome for financial reasons have parties where everybody has to relinquish their phones so none of the ribaldry gets leaked. But Zoey is obsessed with having a “normal” college experience, whatever that is. She probably wouldn’t want to go to a media blackout debauch.
Mid-ambush, Zoey lies to the shitheel “reporter,” saying she didn’t even know Arbor was going to be at the party. But then Charlie tells CJ that Zoey was only at the party to give Arbor his keys back.
CJ goes to Gina to try and get the scoop from her, but uncharacteristically for a federal agent, Gina isn’t a narc.
CJ: Could you describe what, if any, contact Zoey might have had with David Arbor last night?
Gina: No. I’m sorry.
CJ: I don’t understand.
Gina: I’m not permitted to discuss the behavior of my protectee.
CJ: Zoey’s not in trouble.
Gina: I understand.
CJ: …Gina, I’m the press secretary. There’s a story that Zoey’s involved with, and I need you to tell me what you know about last night.
Gina: I’m sorry, C.J. I can’t protect her if she feels she has to do things behind my back. I’m not permitted to discuss the behavior of the protectee.
Getting nowhere with Gina, CJ meets with Zoey and weasels the truth out of her like Oprah did to James Frey. Then it becomes her job to inform the President without letting him freak out and go HAM on the press pool. It goes…
OK? Bartlet has no chill when it comes to his daughter, but CJ successfully talks him down. I love when we get to see competent CJ and not romcom CJ. And especially not lip-sync-for-your-life CJ.
That leaves only the two capital I Issue meetings to discuss. Thankfully, Josh and Sam come out on the right side of history at the end of their meetings, but not without looking like total jerkwads first.
(For the record, my biases are: pro-restorative justice with regards to slavery, which could include financial reparations; anti-school vouchers and charter schools in general; pro-panda; anti-possession as a felony.)
Josh eventually realizes that people such as Jeff Breckinridge (the civil rights lawyer they want as Assistant Attorney General of Civil Rights) don’t necessarily have to give up all of their beliefs to access power. That has been the Bartlet Administration’s go-to move, but it doesn’t have to be everybody’s. And of course the thing that helps him understand the principled position is making it personal.
Josh: Jeff, the committee is going to be looking for a certain degree of practicality. We don’t have $1.7 trillion. To raise $1.7 trillion, we would have to sell Texas and the U.S. Navy.
Jeff: I understand the predicament and I’m willing to give you a break. We’ll take our money in tax deductions and scholarship funds, how ‘bout that?
Josh: How about you take it in affirmative action and empowerment zones and civil rights acts?
Jeff: Three things which we wouldn’t have needed in the first place.
Josh: You know, Jeff, I’d love to give you the money, I really would. But I’m a little short of cash right now. It seems the S.S. officer forgot to give my grandfather his wallet back when he let him out of Birkenau.
Jeff: Well, your beef’s with the Germans.
Josh: You’re damn right it is! [Josh looks at his father’s picture in the wall.] What the hell are we talking about?
And Sam believed in public schools all along, he just decided to play Devil’s Advocate for two hours. Mallory, Leo’s daughter, found Sam’s position paper arguing for school vouchers. Mallory and Sam had been getting kind of flirty in the past, they’d kissed, so Leo gave Mal evidence of Sam’s unfitness as a partner. Mal and Sam yell for two hours, only for Leo to let Mal know later that Sam wrote the position paper as preparation for a debate, to get into the head of a pro-school voucher guy.
Why didn’t Sam say anything before? Why is Mallory charmed by this frankly sociopathic behavior?
This is supposed to be cute, but the only people who think arguing for funzies is romantic are true nightmares to be around. Mallory should learn from Laurie the sex worker and stay far, far away.
What’s Next: Someone finds the White House Burn Book.
For the rest of Kheiro’s West Wing recaps visit: kheiromag.com/westwing, and be sure to sign up to receive Kheiro straight to your inbox.
