How I’ve Used Body Language to Get the Most Out of Social Interactions
While this blog may be reaching its conclusion, my journey of developing the soft skill of kinesics has only just begun. Since starting this blog, I’ve done far more research into body language and nonverbal communication than ever before. This has allowed me to learn a lot about not only myself but the way that humans interact and behave in general, particularly during social engagements. Recently, my focus has been on modifying two main parts of my body language behavior to communicate non-verbally in a more efficient, positive way:
1. Making more meaningful hand gestures to further enunciate my point and resonate with my audience
2. Attempting to reduce my fidgeting during social interactions with new people, or people of a higher statues (i.e., employers, professors, administration, etc.)
Making Hand Gestures That Have Meaning
If you’ve been following along with the posts on this blog, then you’ll know that yesterday, hand gestures were one of the topics covered in the article “Using Body Language to Your Advantage”. Hand gestures is one of the more interesting aspects of nonverbal communication to me because they can really help bolster the strength of your words, emphasize points, and visualize things to your audience. To practice this skill, I have analyzed the hand gestures of famous, successful, and powerful people when they talk with others or deliver speeches to the public. I’ve then tried to replicate and incorporate these actions and motions into my own daily life when conversing with others. I’ve aimed to make hand gestures that aren’t too dramatic, but ones that are just enough to display confidence and openness in what I am trying to communicate. I’ve certainly noticed an improvement in my use of this skill, and as a result, my interactions with others have gone far more fluently. When I’m speaking, I feel as if people seem more engaged and interested in what I have to say than they did before. This has changed my thinking in a way that makes me feel more confident to express my ideas and feelings to others, and in turn, it seems to make them feel more open and comfortable speaking with me.
Cutting Down on Fidgeting
I believe that this is a skill everyone could benefit from. Whenever we find ourselves in a new, awkward, or uncomfortable social situation, people tend to fidget around in one way or another because of social anxiety. No matter how severe or minimum the fidgeting may be, it can still communicate to others that you are not exactly comfortable in the social situation, which can make them uncomfortable as well or negatively influence their perception of you. While these methods may not work for everyone, the two things that helped me drastically improve my fidgeting and, as a result, my confidence when communicating, was to:
1. Get more sleep
2. Taking note of whenever I begin fidgeting, and replacing it with a manual focus on intentional deep breathing and remaining still
By rearranging my schedule so that I get a fuller sleep each night, I am more well-rested and ready for what the day is going to throw at me. When engaged in a social situation, I feel as if I am more focused, alert, and in control of my place in that engagement. Whenever I catch myself fidgeting in conversations now, shifting my focus to deep breathing helps me shut out all of the background noise in my head, taking my attention away from my social anxiety and rediverting my focus back into the present moment and slowing my heart rate back down. I’ve noticed a vast improvement in my ability to stay focused and engaged in conversations, as well as an increase in self-confidence overall due to this reduction in fidgeting. Doing this has changed the way I think without a doubt, because not only do I need to maintain constant awareness of what I am doing with my hands and body so that I can stop fidgeting as it starts, but by ceasing and reducing fidgeting overall, I feel more positive and self-assured when I’m speaking or even listening to others. Additionally, I feel far less anxious in social engagements, allowing me to have more positive experiences and enjoy myself more freely.
Looking Forward
Although I’ve learned a lot about body language and non-verbal communication in the past several weeks, I feel as if I’ve only scratched the surface. This is a lifelong skill that everyone can benefit from becoming more knowledgeable about and implementing into their daily lives. I plan to continue monitoring my own body language, improving it where I can, and reading and interpreting the body language of others. Up to this point, improving my abilities in kinesics has helped to foster better relationships and more positive social interactions with friends, family, and strangers alike, and yet this is still only the beginning of my journey of non-verbal self-improvement.
