Cognitive Dissonance: Good Friday

Tonight I should watch and pray with You in Gethsemane
As You agonize over the price of Your peoples’ sins.
Instead I close my eyes and cringe to get out of bed,
Begging You to take away the little agonies of kids and husband, job loss and healthcare.

Tonight I should stand silent sentry
As You let Yourself be bound and led away.
Instead I draw the tongue-sword to die,
Grumbling and complaining about the slavery of modern life.

Tomorrow I should walk with You under the cross
On Your dusty way of sorrow to Golgotha.
Instead I will plant myself,
Refusing Your counsel and direction.

Tomorrow I should silently weep
As the gentiles drive the nails into Your hands and feet.
Instead I will laughingly hand them
The hammer and nails of pride, anger, and hypocrisy.

Tomorrow I should stand silent watch
With the Marys as your life pours out.
Instead I will faux slake your thirst
With the gall of half-hearted worship and mumbled broken promises of helps to Your people.

Tomorrow as You speak, “It is finished,”
I should bow my head and declare, “Truly You are God’s Son.”
Instead I will spear Your side
Through disunity with Your children and omitted good words and deeds.

Today I hear Your voice.
Tomorrow will be too late.

Today Your blood cleanses and covers me.
Tomorrow grace will win.

Today Your Spirit quickens me.
Tomorrow I will sing and dance in true worship.

Today You defeated sin, death, and hell.
Tomorrow I will live in victorious freedom fully forgiven.

Today Your wounds and stripes heal me.
Tomorrow I will have health as my soul prospers.

Today I fell prey to sin.
Tomorrow morning I will receive fresh mercy and forgiveness.