Zippy Take Over, #2

Whoa! It’s been almost two weeks since I’ve been here. I’ve learned some new words watching my humans typing and watching the big rectangles. I am so looking forward to sharing some thoughts in some different areas.

Day and Night

These humans are so crazy. They have their activity all mixed up. They should lie in their beds in the sun during the day, getting warm and rested. Then, when it’s dark and cooler, they should move and do things. The one older female is especially mixed up; I can’t even get her to slow down and scratch me sometimes during the day. I’ve watched all the human food dishes and human food things flying all over because of this older female, and I don’t know how to tell her this, but she really smells better to me when she goes slower. I think the older man is closer to right with his activity levels and speed (besides, he got me good treats, so he has to be right).

Communicating

I’m frustrated. They have those funny paws they call hands and they’ve been doing all sorts of pointing and gesturing. I’ve been learning that if I do certain actions like sit or stay or get down in response to the gestures, and I do the same action with the same gesture, they all get crazy happy.

I don’t have those paws. I’m trying to find ways to communicate. I’ve learned that if I touch my nose to a certain door I can get them to take me outside (not that that’s been real useful with the cold and snow).

I did make my throat vibrate, and I watched the one young female human give me my seat on the end of my couch rather quickly; however, the older female human picked me up, put me on the other end of the couch, and gave the seat back to the younger human, and then the older human turned her back. I must have not communicated clearly, or maybe I missed something.

But my sad eyes don’t get me more of my food, and my sad eyes don’t get me human food either. I’m so confused. I also can’t seem to get the particular human I want when I want her; these humans don’t seem to read the speed and pattern of my tail wag very well. I wish I had a better way to tell them who and what I want.

Cats

I really thought I made it clear at the other place I lived that I didn’t like those four-legged furballs humans call cats. I have watched these cats just sauntering all over my yard, and they won’t leave. I don’t understand why those cats can’t get their own furever homes away from mine. At least I do have a clear wall between me and them.

My Yard

I have this huge yard the humans walk me around. I love every inch of it. There are so many places to stop and smell things that I get so excited I have to pee. They have these funny artificial trees that are hard and not shaped right at all; those are the best to pee on because my human looks like he or she hears something when I do. There are these miniature trees with bright red puffs or maybe some white puffs; the humans don’t seem to like it so much when I pee there (although I have tricked a younger human female into letting me). My favorite place to poop is right where those cats make fun of me.

Family

I am so excited. I learned that I have another dog cousin. I didn’t think I had any dog family, but it looks like he got adopted like I did. He and I didn’t talk much, just sniffed each other; he doesn’t seem to understand that I can’t get his barking and snorting. ‘Gins was so much fun. He even shared his water dish with me, and his human gave me something white and tasty called cheese. I hope I get to visit him again soon.

Originally published at kittiephoenixromans08.wordpress.com on November 30, 2014.