DAY 4 OF 30 OF THE JOURNEY THROUGH JUNE WRITING CHALLENGE
I Don’t Really Talk To My Sister Much Anymore
What would I say to her and why are we no longer talking?
Both of my siblings are still around. They are younger than me and they live in California in my hometown. I talk to my brother frequently. It’s my sister that I have a bit of a strained relationship with. She lives with my dad and her partner. They are raising her four kids together. The youngest two are his and hers. I just found out from a message that she just got her two-year college degree, finally. Her birthday is coming up this month as well. She’ll be 39 years old.
What would I even say to her at this point? Our relationship used to be really close. When we were kids, she and I were closer than my brother and I were. I think that this is natural because we are less than two years apart. She started doing drugs and running away from home as a teenager. That was the first sign of our relationship crumbling.
Then there was the time that she stole my girlfriend from me. That wasn’t very sisterly. She made me live with them too after she broke us up. I moved out of my mom’s house for the first time at the age of 21 just to move back in after that experiment failed.
Then there was the time she brought her drug dealing and sociopathic boyfriend into the house to live with us. He’s the father of her first three children. One of them was taken away by the paternal grandmother and has been kept away from my sister since he was about 7 months old.
I found out that after she and the boyfriend broke up, he was still able to see my nephew despite the fact that he was the one who was dealing her the drugs she was using when CPS took him away. Anyway, I had a bunch of traumatic stuff happen to me when he lived with me and at that point, my sister and I were barely on speaking terms.
My dad moved in with my sister and I suspect he’s been used and abused but I can’t prove it. I’ve called adult protection to check in on him. At one point, I didn’t even know their address because they kept the purchase of their new house a secret for over a year. I have so much I’d like to tell my sister. I resent her but I still love her.
I think I’d just tell her that despite all of the bad shit that’s happened over the years, I still want to maintain some semblance of a relationship with her. I don’t feel any ill will toward her or her partner, who isn’t the same one that did all of the stuff, but he’s also kind of a piece of work himself. I just want to be able to talk to her like we used to.
Plus, she’s got four beautiful children and I want to be able to see my nieces more often. I know at this point that I’m 2,500 miles away but I am willing to put aside our differences to let her kids know that their uncle didn’t ignore or abandon them. It really is for the kids.
The oldest one is now going to be 16 years old later this year. She’ll reach adulthood mostly under the influence of her mother’s instruction since my sister has homeschooled all four of her kids. She will barely know or remember me. I can’t have her turn out how her mom did.
Anyway, I think I just wanted to give a bit of background about my sister before saying what I’d say to her. I think that I talk to her maybe twice a year and I’ll probably wish her a happy birthday but we’re such different people at this point that I don’t even really know where to start the conversation.
Maybe if she actually wanted to reach out to me first, I wouldn’t mind continuing a conversation that she starts. After all, we are still family.
Mike and I are still camping right now. We are on Day 7 of our two-week reservation. I skipped writing yesterday because I was tired and a bit stressed and needed a break. I still popped in here and there on June 4th but I did some editing in two publications and then played Madden 23 for the rest of the day. I also managed to get two Duolingo lessons in before the day turned over to maintain my 80-day learning streak. I’ve started learning Finnish now because I love how the language sounds. I’m also still working on Dutch and Swedish at the moment. I will be writing my other prompts throughout the day today.
Adrienne Beaumont, Autistic Widower (“AJ”), Brett Jenae Tomlin, Keeley Schroder, Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles, Trisha Faye, Karen Schwartz, NancyO, Katie Michaelson, Bernie Pullen, Michelle Jimerson Morris, Toni The Talker, Amy Frances, Julia A. Keirns, Ravyne Hawke, Pamela Oglesby, Harry Hogg, Tina, Pat Romito LaPointe, Ruby Noir, K. Joseph, Brandon Ellrich, Misty Rae, Karen Hoffman, Susie Winfield, Vincent Pisano, Kiara (pronounced key-air-uh), Marlene Samuels, Ray Day, Randy Pulley, Michael Rhodes, Lu Skerdoo, Pluto Wolnosci, Paula Shablo, Bruce Coulter, Ellen Baker, Kelley Murphy, Leigh-Anne Dennison, Jennifer Marla Pike, Carmen Ballesteros, Marlana, MSW, Patricia Timmermans, Lauren Alida, Amanda Weir-Gertzog, Denise Kendig, Rachella Angel Page, Lisa Guard, Jan Sebastian, Henry India Holden💖, Adrian CDTPPW, Rachel Thomas, Erie Astin, Becca CO 🌵, Emily Porter, Nevena Pascaleva, Mario Duff, Lynn L. Alexander, Chantell, Bear Kosik, Jerry Dwyer, and yours truly, The Sturg.
