Dead Man’s Apology
Some Apologies are Never Sought, while Some Regrets Last Throughout Life
A relative of mine left the world a few days ago. Everyone was sad and was missing him. They were sharing their thoughts with each other about how good a person he was and were discussing his achievements and the helping nature that he carried.
Some of the people's words for him made me go insane, as a few months before, this was not the scenario. These were the same people who had some differences with him, were upset with him, and had stopped talking to him.
I wondered what made them bring about a change in them; why are they saying all good things about him now?
Initially, I believed they were putting up a fake show. Surprisingly, they were not; they were deeply upset by his death, missed him, felt guilty about not resolving their issues with him, and couldn't convey their apologies while he was alive.
Their regrets were of no use to them now, as even if they wanted to convey their respect and love to him, they cannot.
Why do people want to miss people only after they are gone? Why don't people act before it's too late? Why do some people get their due apologies only after their deaths? These questions made me sad.
I also thought even the dead man could have taken steps to reconcile his differences, as I believe that misconceptions arise from both sides, and if he had lived a little longer, he would have realised this someday and approached them. But now that he has gone, he’s left an apology waiting on his end.
I don't know who is right and who is wrong, but I know that if the person had been alive, the time would have come where both of them would have exchanged their apologies and sorted out their differences. But life didn't give a chance to either of them.
One thing I realised was that life may or may not give us a chance to convey our care and respect, which is hidden deep in our hearts for some people, and we hesitate to express it just because of a few differences with the person.
It's fine if we have some incomplete work left behind, as someone can complete it. But it will be a great loss to us if we have some words to say or some feelings to express and we stop ourselves just because we want to satisfy our ego and choose to ignore the person, thinking either we have time or wait for them to approach us first.
I never want to take along with me an apology that belongs to someone, nor do I want to be the person who is left behind, regretting all his life that he could not apologise to the one gone.
