From Grunts To Drools: Unraveling Cultural Prophesies of Babyhood
What secrets do snails hide under their cave homes?
Within a month, I was calling my newborn daughter, Tractor.
And no, it wasn’t because she was too fat. I just had never known a baby to grunt as loudly as she could.
GrrrrMmmggggGrrrrrMmmm…
I would jump up from my sleep, wondering what was going on — oh, it was just her. Such a tiny thing and yet, such loud grunts.
GrrrrMmmggggGrrrrrMmmm…
“That means she would eat a lot and be fat,” Said my mother.
“What?” I asked
“That is the belief of our people,” My mother continued quickly, “It is believed that loudly grunting-babies (I never knew I would one day be typing these words), would be fat, later in life,”
What the what now?
There was no need for argument with my mother. She was only informing me of a belief I hadn’t known previously.
Loudly grunting babies would be fat later in life. Did YOU know that?
It did not stop there.
Now that my baby has learned that the biggest adventure in the world is biting her toes, my mother has also informed me that according to our people, the Igbos:
O ga eso nso
Translation: Babies who bite their toes are believed to be children who will do a lot of follow-follow — following others around.
It does seem like the destiny of my child has been decided for her even before she can recognize her name. Usually, this would be a cause for concern.
Except, my 3 months plus daughter drools and yes, there is a belief here. According to my people still,
A drooling baby shows their mother ate lots of snails while pregnant.
Here is where I say — lies. I love snails alright, but for the past one year, I have eaten exactly zero. (Good to be reminded to have some though).
“Thunder fire your scrotum!” My late grandmother, shivering with rage, had screamed at my brother the day she overheard him saying he wanted to have twins.
We were both shocked at her rage because my brother being a boy meant she favoured him as he would be bearing the next generation to continue the family lineage and had always been nothing but loving towards him.
Why would this same woman who loved him so, scream such hateful words at him?
Well, we were reminded that the people of my grandmother’s generation were still those who threw away twin babies into the evil forest because they were evil.
Evil because? More than one child birthed at once was unnatural and evil.
Knowing an otherwise loving woman who went crazy over the mention of twins, I am not close-minded in thinking that while these statements —
- It means she would be fat
- It means she would be a follower of people
- It means you ate a lot of snails…,
While I might find them ridiculous beliefs, I will not be surprised if there are people living today, who can swear on everything they hold dear that these statements and others like them, are hundred percent true.
Maybe You. Maybe you believe them.
Thank You For Reading. What is your most ridiculous belief? (I will try not to judge).