How My Week From Hell Brought Me Closer To Heaven
I tried something new this week that has brought me tremendous spiritual growth and I want to share it with you.
The Storms of Life
How do you respond to problems, challenges, crises, or those times when life hands you a situation that just plain sucks?
What about those times when life feels like that “Wack-a-Mole” game at the county fair? As soon as you smack one problem down another pops up on the left. Smack! Then another one appears on the right. Smack! Smack! Two more pop up in front of you. And on it goes.
How do you respond? Are you a worrier? Do you pray? Maybe you manifest for the light to overcome the darkness. Do you prefer to recite affirmations out loud in an effort to call the goodness toward you? Perhaps you call on a higher power for deliverance. Maybe you run to your crystals to cleanse your energy. Perhaps you throw your hands up and reach for your numbing agent of choice.
Personally, I have run the proverbial gamut of ways to cope, manage, react or respond to problems in life.
But this week I tried something new…gratitude.
Wait! This is not going to turn into some sappy, feel-good post. This is practical advice that has really changed my life so please keep reading.
My Crazy Week
Ok, good. Glad you are still with me.
A few days ago I came home feeling completely drained, physically and mentally, from a week of hell at work. Have you ever been knocked off your feet by a wave in the ocean? You struggle to your feet, gasping for breath just as another wave hits your disoriented body from behind and knocks you under again…and again…and again? Well, that was my week.
That night I curled up in bed and reached for something spiritual to read. I keep all sorts of spiritual resources in my home: translations of the Baghavad Gita, anthologies of mystic writings, books on meditation by Eknath Easwaran, commentaries on Buddhist sutras, an NIV translation of the Bible and a couple of daily devotionals.
I believe in a spiritual path formed from individual personal experiences, not man-made, organized “religion”. I believe that God, the Divine, whatever you call the Supreme Force holding the Universe together, has been speaking to us from the very beginning and there is wisdom to be gleaned from many sources. If you are curious to read more on this topic please check out my article, There Is No Religion in Heaven.
Back To My Story….
That night, I wanted something light; nothing too heavy. I wasn’t going to tackle the Diamond Sutra or anything. I merely wanted something positive to take with me as I drifted off to sleep in the hopes that the morning would bring a new perspective.
I absent-mindedly reached for a daily devotional laying on the night stand and opened it to the current date.
The passage I read spoke about thanking God for whatever current problem you were facing and viewing that problem as a vehicle for God to teach you, grow you and bless you. The paragraph I read referred to this passage from the book of James in the Bible:
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ~ James 1:2–4
Normally, my response would have been, “Yeah, right!” Cue the eye-rolling.
Over the years I have heard this passage in addition to other well-intentioned spiritual quotes from various sources:
It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. ~ Buddha
The things that hurt you the most teach you the greatest lessons in life. ~ Unknown
Well meaning friends have quoted that very passage from the book of James to me. It never actually helped. It only served to increase my anger and frustration. Truth be told, it also kind of made me feel like I wanted to punch the other person in the face. Just a little. In as spiritual a way as possible, of course.
I mean, who wants to hear that when you are upset and stressed? It doesn’t make sense! I don’t feel joyful! I don’t feel grateful! I am dealing with a problem here, people! What weirdo in their right mind would be happy about having a problem?! I wasn’t a masochist.
As you can see, I had a little problem with this particular spiritual perspective. I definitely approached this topic with what my teacher would call lower chakra energy. The concept just didn’t sit right with me. It seemed so illogical. I still had too much fight in me on this issue.
But that night Heaven must have had all my stars aligned because I looked at the passage and said, “Eff it! Why not give it a try?” and I thanked God for the problem that was on my mind.
Now, I do not recommend starting your deep spiritual conversations with the Divine by saying “eff it” but I do think Heaven knows how hard it is to be a human down here some days and absolutely cuts us some slack when the need arises.
As I thanked God for the problem that was on my mind, I gave it my all. I approached with a mindset of, “ I really need an answer and if this is how You want to operate, ok. I give up. We will do it your way. Thank you for this problem. Show me why I have to deal with this now and what I need to do to resolve this. I don’t know anything else to do and I am waiting on you.”
In short, I was ready to surrender to this method of communication with the Divine. I had reached that point in my spiritual growth.
In short, I was ready to surrender to this method of communication with the Divine. I had reached that point in my spiritual growth.
The Most Amazing Thing Happened Next
A peace settled over me, my mind cleared, I felt an opening in the energy around me and I ACTUALLY HEARD AN ANSWER.
In an instant, it was like God pulled back the camera for the wide angle shot and I could see the entire situation from His perspective. I saw what I needed to do for my part. More importantly, I saw where I needed to use patience and faith to trust Him to do the rest.
It was, in a word, life changing.
Ok, that’s two words. But you get my point, right?
I tried this a couple more times with different problems over the past few days and each time I received a simple but profoundly illuminating answer to that specific problem.
My Double Or Nothing Moment
Today, I decided to go for broke.
For the past 12 years I have struggled with a health condition that can leave me in excruciating pain for weeks at a time. There have even been occasions where I have been unable to walk for a day or two due to the severe pain and inflammation in my body.
I have tried everything to heal myself. I mean EVERYTHING. I have prayed, cried, begged, manifested, declared, affirmed, lit candles…you name it. Over the years I would have periods of relief and then major set backs as the pain would flare up again leaving me feeling defeated and discouraged.
This morning I woke up groggy from a night spent tossing and turning in pain. I hadn’t gotten much sleep but my schedule demanded an early start today so I rolled out of bed and limped toward the bathroom.
As I looked at myself in the mirror, bracing myself against the pain in my back and hip, a thought occurred to me. While I thought I had tried everything to heal myself I realized I hadn’t thanked God for the problem. I hadn’t asked Him to show me how He was using this problem in my life to make me more “complete and mature” in my spiritual walk. The words from the passage in James came back to me…..Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
With a sincere heart, desperate for change, I thanked Him for the all the years of struggle with this issue and for all the pain. I simply and genuinely said “thank you”, trusting that the Divine was good even if my situation did not look good at the moment.
In an instant, I had my answer downloaded in my consciousness. It happened so fast. It takes me longer to explain what happened than it took for me to actually receive the information.
He showed me what I need to do consistently to take better care of myself going forward. I was missing a certain discipline in my health and nutrition regimen that would come back to haunt me badly as I aged. He even gave me a timeline! If I could discipline myself for the certain amount of time He specified, in the way my body needed to be cared for at this stage in my life, the problem would go away and never come back. Further more, He showed me that had I not had this specific health problem that I was currently experiencing I would have had to deal with a far worse problem in the future.
In life we have to dance around things that are good, bad and ugly. God was using the bad to prevent the ugly.
In life we have to dance around things that are good, bad and ugly. God was using the bad to prevent the ugly.
Just like that, in the blink of an eye, 12 years of suffering found closure. I stood there sort of stunned for a minute trying to process what just occurred. Then I realized the pain in my body had almost completely diminished.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be overjoyed or kick myself for being so stubborn and obstinate for so many years.
I ended up choosing joy.
The Takeaway
No words exist to fully describe the transformation that has occurred within me. What I can say is this: My new found perspective on the problems which fall across our path has brought so much to my life that I immediately wanted to share it in the hopes that it could help as many people as possible.
I am not saying this is easy. You can see how I struggled with this for many years. As with all spiritual growth points, this is a very personal issue. We arrive at our own specific points of surrender on our own unique time table. Each soul’s walk is so personal, so individualized, so unique. However, the great thing about spiritual breakthroughs is that once they arrive they are here to stay.
One thing I do know is this: God always meets you where you are. He understands your growth and your path because He created you. I would absolutely say that this method of fighting your problems with gratitude can work for you where ever you are in your spiritual walk.
God always meets you where you are.
Maybe you believe in the Universe or God or Jesus. Perhaps you talk to Krishna, or the angels or goddess Kuan Yin. If you have even a seedling of faith and trust that there is a Higher Power working with you and guiding you then you too can find answers to your problems through gratitude. Why? Because all of Heaven is good. No part of Heaven wants to see us suffer. No one in Heaven wants us to remain in pain; be it physical, mental or emotional.
However, the growth of our soul for Eternity’s sake is more important than our temporary comfort here on earth. Heaven is ruthless in Its pursuit of our growth because Heaven is desperate in Its love for us.
Heaven is ruthless in Its pursuit of our growth because Heaven is desperate in Its love for us.
I will leave you all with one final word. As always, anything I write is merely meant to be a sharing of my own personal experiences and opinions. I never want anyone to believe anything I say or write simply because I have said it. But if something I have said here sparks a stirring in you or resonates with you in some way, then go for it, my friend! One day we can share our experiences on this topic in Eternity.
Oh, and if you are curious as to which book I was reading when Heaven finally broke through my thick skull on this issue it was Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young.
