I Quit Autopiloting My Life
And use these 4 assignments to follow through.
Go with the flow
As people always say.
Life could be so “easy” if we just follow wherever it takes us.
When things don’t go as expected.
We console ourselves:
Life happens.
That doesn’t work anymore.
There was a time when I finally realized.
I realized that it wouldn't work if I wanted to live with intention.
It’s never easy to realize how to take initiative.
Definitely harder than surrendering to life.
But no more cold feet.
What does it actually mean to quit autopiloting and decide how to live the life you want?
It means knowing who you want to be
It all starts with the awakening from the sedated state of self.
There’s always one thing or circumstance that hits you like a hammer. Wake you from the past and make you realize you are an observer of yourself as well as your life.
You no longer let the external world define who you are.
You start to know yourself.
You start to build yourself.
But it also means to:
Face the abyss you feared.
Leave the mental comfort zone.
Embrace vulnerability even if it hurts.
When you do so with intention, it’ll be exciting just to see how much you’ve changed and how much of self you’ve discovered.
That is the very first step but I’d say the most difficult one of all. It’ll take consistent input of time and energy to get started and get used to being with yourself.
It requires you to spend time with your own thoughts and mind, be introspective and discover the limiting beliefs that got in the way.
It means knowing what life you want to live
When you start to have a more holistic image of self, you will see yourself as in a bigger scope of life.
What could this life mean to you?
What matters the most to you?
What do you value and stand for?
What do you want from it?
What life do you want to live?
Those questions don't necessarily lead to certain answers as mine still change from time to time.
People want different things in life at different stages of life. Also, when your self-image changes with your progress of figuring out who you really are, the goal of life shall change as well.
There will certainly be doubt.
The doubt of self:
- You might think you don't deserve it.
- You might think you are not worth it.
- You might think you are not capable.
I can’t tell you otherwise unless you correct yourself.
It happens when people think the “truth” is too hard to handle, they’d rather go back to autopilot mode. I think of the movie Matrix when Cypher, one of the crew members of Neo’s team, decided to make a deal with Agent Smith and put himself back to “sleep”. He would rather be plugged back into the illusive life in Matrix than face the hard truth.
Blue pill or red pill.
Your choice.
It means blocking outside noises
While trying to figure out the answers to life, I have to remind you to be aware of the outside noises that will influence you with or without you knowing it.
- The rules and principles society sets to regulate us.
- The value school taught us.
- The expectations that the elders put upon us.
Not saying you should set those all to flame, but just a reminder to inspect those ideas for a moment when you’re trying to achieve your own goals. There’re always things we need to unlearn. But I can’t tell exactly what that is because, again, you are here to know how to drive your own “car” right?
Besides those structures, in our daily lives, there’re still smaller volumes of noises that could change the trajectory subtly but consistently:
- Glamorous new posts on social media.
- Comments from people you know.
- Criteria of the communities we’re in.
- Relationships with other people.
We live under the rules set to regulate our behaviors and therefore the outcomes. If those are getting in the way of you living the life you want, maybe it’s time to rethink how to elevate yourself even at the cost of setting boundaries with the old self.
It means making decisions that seem against intuition
Be prepared because the best way might not be the easiest way.
The courage to make difficult decisions and choose a path you know it’s right never turns out to be easy.
Why do we do that to ourselves?
Why do we have to make it difficult?
You need to know that:
- It doesn't mean to torture yourself. It means taking control of the trajectory of your life on a road where no one else can see.
- It doesn't mean to risk yourself. It means being willing to face the consequences of your own choices.
- It doesn't mean to go against the world. It means to be brave to have your own answer when everyone else is telling you otherwise.
When you’ve had enough of the “exercises” of coping under the updated self that is built by consciousness. Your intuition will also change and at that time, your knowing and practicing will become more aligned.
Final Thoughts
The practice of piloting your own life definitely takes time, energy and a lot of self-introspection.
It’s not you against the world but just you, and only you.
To take charge of creating the life you actually want, or just lay back and go with the flow, it’s your choice to make.
Not only THE choice but also many choices, the effort, the responsibilities, the consequences, the true self and the life to live.
If you’re ready.
It’s your choice.
Have faith and be gentle with yourself.
Start now and start small :D
Follow me on an inspirational mindfulness journey!
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