My Children’s Dream to Fly
Breaking Gender Stereotype
“Papa!” My 4.5-year-old called me while entering the room with his 2.5-year-old sister. The countenance on both faces somehow showed a bit of urgency and confusion.
I folded a paper of my current read and looked up at them.
“Yes.”
“Do you know what I want to be when I grow up?” My son’s face had turned red with the elation of finally finding out what he will be doing when he grows up. My little girl was also looking at her big brother like he’d found some hidden treasure. She was also eager to pitch in but somehow controlled her brewing emotions.
“Okay, what do you want to become when you grow up?” I asked attentively.
“Piolet” His excitement was brewing hot.
“Great! I am glad to hear that,” said I in return with the absolute zeal I could muster, showing approval with the beaming smile on my face. I wanted to hear him more — How come he found out his interest; though it’s too early to settle on, I felt pride in that he’s up to discovering novel ways of expressing his interest.
“Papa, I also wanna be a pilot.” My little girl also uttered out loud — eyes sparkling like thousands of stars had accumulated in her eyes. I loved her zest. However, I knew that she was copying her elder brother.
She idolizes her brother. I am delighted at their strong sibling bond.
“But Insha, you can’t be a piolet.” My son blurted it out before I even appreciated my little girl for at least exploring her ways. A layer of confusion draped me.
I know that this age is too young to be settled on one thing at last but I believe that she was at the age where every unique thing picked her interest. Her imagination is on to exploration — trying to get the gist of everything she reads, hears, sees, and experiences.
I witnessed how her dream of becoming a pilot and flying an airplane started to land on the ground. The excitement and merriment on her face had turned into bewilderment.
Even I couldn’t swallow the outright rejection from my 4.5-year-old mouth.
“But I want to be a piolet like him,” she insisted. I could see the spark of those thousands of sparkling stars were going to dwindle one by one. And this I didn’t want to happen, ever.
I sensed that every atom of excitement would soon turn into wails.
“But why she can’t be a piolet?” I raised my eyebrow at my son and also tried to tame my little princess a bit. “Yes, you will become the piolet if you like to be”
“But Insha! Piolets are all boys.” He interjected and continued, “But you can become the air hostess.” He said it casually, trying to come up with an alternate, but neither Insha nor I would be buying this alternate.
I couldn’t fathom the simplest statement so easily. I felt a surge of disturbance run through my spine and before I flare it out. I chose to correct his perception rather politely.
“No, Azhaan. Girls can also become Piolet, and they are flying many planes nowadays. And about air hostess, there is no specific gender assigned to this profession, even a boy can be an air hostess.” I tried to make him understand that there are no defined limits set to girls, and girls have as many options as boys have. I don’t know how he came up with such a conclusion.
“But Papa, I have seen in planes that only girls are the air hostess. I found no boys there.” He seemed adamant and tried to convince me of his reasoning.
I was totally dumbfounded over his observation, my mind immediately started reeling all the plane trips we had had previously, and rummaged through my memories of them if I saw any male air hostess… but … yeah… it’s weird but there are not many male staff I witnessed.
It’s not that I haven’t seen any. But the ratio is a bare minimum to negligible.
He was also right. And neither was I wrong. But the fact is he hasn’t seen any male air hostesses yet because they are fewer.
I flinched a bit over the harsh truth and threw a side look toward my little girl who was going to be shattered. I knew I had to interject. I had to save her first aspiration.
I knew at this very moment that things needed to be cleared. This was on me to make him believe there is no difference between girls and boys, nor they are confined to any boundaries.
Their skies are also blue and infinite.
I knew at that moment that this would be a long journey and wouldn’t going to end right at this moment. This might be a simple conflict of view but yet very essential to have it cleared out.
I think I will not be able to forget this interaction, and I should not. Because I know for sure that my little girl would have to encounter more of it as she lives her life. And I will have to remove all obstacles impeding her goals. I will have to eradicate all those limits that are set to hem in my little girl in a particular set of shells.
My little girl will surely outgrow these so-called societal norms.
My boy has to understand this. Starting from now.
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