Jul 17, 2020
POETRY | MENTAL HEALTH | QUOTE
Seeking Middle Ground
Free Verse Poetry — Finding Balance Between Extremes
I can’t hurt any more than I’ve been hurt, I can’t cry any more than I’ve cried. I’ve been to the highest of highs and lowest of lows, so one day I’m going to find my middle ground and be happy. ~Cheryl Cole
I evolve around black or white, good or bad, right or wrong
choose one, choose one — and I teeter on the line, swaying
from one extreme to the other, wishing there was another way
It’s like choosing between the sun’s warmth or the moon’s chill
the caw, caw, caw of a raven or the hooting of an owl
the strong arms of a man or the tender thighs of a woman
I grapple between love or lust, Jesus or Buddha, God or Goddess
the breathing of the ocean or the quiet stillness of the mountains
a crescendo of friends or soft whispers of Catharine in my mind
And then there is the darkness dragging me under — come hither!
or the light burning brightly seeking to guide me back to Thee
weaving or ducking, pitching or lurching — a squeaky seesaw effect
If I could swirl the extremes, I would — then I think, I can. I will!
I remove the starkness of my white and the deepest void of my black,
add a little blue and green, a dash of purple and pink, a hint of yellow
and I dance upon the curves of infinity in a sparkling taffeta dress
©2020 Lori Carlson. All Rights Reserved.
Those of us with Borderline Personality Disorder are plagued by extremes — our thought processes jump from this or that, we stumble between addictions or wellness, we slip between excessive joy or disturbing sadness. We go all in on whatever choice we make, sticking to it until something sidelines us and then off we go on another extreme. Until my mid-40s, this was my routine. I flip-flopped on the banks of rivers like a freshly caught fish. All I wanted though was balance. Mindfulness taught me that balance, but it has to be worked at, constantly. It takes very little to make me lose my balance and tumble into my old ways.
FYI: Catharine is one of my muses.
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Lori Carlson writes poetry, fiction, articles and personal essays. Most of her topics are centered around Relationships, Spirituality, Life Lessons, Mental Health, and the LGBTQ+ community. She currently writes for Illumination,💜The POM💜 , The Friday Fix, House of Haiku, Know Thyself, Heal Thyself, The Purple Pen, Tempest in Under 1000, The Weekly Knob, The Rebel Poets Society, Heart Revolution, Share the Love, Spiritual Tree and Written Tales.
