Sitting With Difficult Emotions
Befriending my demons.
I lifted my head towards the night sky. This is the time I get to see the easel of the Creator, like curtains drawn full wide, revealing the universe beyond in its silence of serenity. Heaven-spun stars illuminate the sky.
My breathing deepens just a little. I found a spot and sink myself onto the ground. There’s a sense of warmth springing from the chilly night air. Eyes closed, I saw myself evaporate, and a distorted version emerged. I inhaled deeply to go further within.
The darkness kisses my skin, flattering and cool. This is my favorite thing, to sit alone with myself, to observe and discover the inner person. There is no need to hide. I unlock the cage and swing the gate open. I waited. There’s no rush. I hold this position for as long as it takes, seeing nothing at all. The only evidence of my being is the steady thump of my heart.
Slowly, they enter. It’s an emotional hurricane in full force which is the trigger of my past. No, they’re not part of me, yet they blend inside me in the most entrancing of ways. I’m the Observer, me watching me.
Fear emerged out of the cage. I remembered it was because you loved me. I was unsure, lost in the fog, trying to find my way out of this confusion. She approached closer. My heart was beating fast, but I…
