Sometimes This is What Depression Looks Like…
Normalizing the struggle and authentically sharing the truth about my mental health
I’m starting this article without knowing where it’s going. All I know is I’ve felt nudged to share about my mental health journey lately. Before the holidays, I was running out of the house in a rush for a meeting. My eyes felt tired and dry, and I had a beanie on to cover my greasy hair and itchy scalp.
On my way to the meeting, I was sucking down as much green juice as I could from a 1 liter bottle I found and bought at Grocery Outlet. The flavor was matcha jalapeño, and although it didn’t taste great, I had no other choice. I had spent too long inside my head that morning — doing things — but while preoccupied. So much so, that I forgot to fuel and nourish myself.
And on my drive, I thought about how sometimes this is what depression looks like; it’s not staying in bed all day and sleeping, though it can be that, too. But sometimes depression is waking up early and still running out of the house late. It’s feeling detached from yourself and your body, and it’s drinking the nasty green juice you purchased from a discount store and not caring how bad it tastes. It’s gulping it down and hoping you don’t run a stop sign because of how far off you are.
