Where’s My Money and Where’s My Honey?
The two questions that psychics are most often asked
As I sat sipping coffee with a fellow healer and author, he said, “Everybody wants to know if they’re going to find love or make money.”
We were talking about what it means to leave more conventional careers to pursue spiritual paths, and we got on the topic of psychic reading, which is part of what I do.
My coffee companion elaborated, “A friend of mine who also does readings says those are the two questions everyone asks — where’s my money and where’s my honey?”
Another friend of mine who also does readings put it slightly differently. “Am I getting the job? Am I getting the guy or girl?”
Many people who come in for a reading want answers about money and love, often in that order.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with those questions. We all deserve material security and love. There’s something deeply human about those questions. I’ve experienced periods when I’ve had neither, sometimes simultaneously. Feeling unloved and insecure materially are two of the most painful feelings we can experience.
But the more I do this work, the more I’ve come to believe that these aren’t the right questions to ask.
I’ve had major intuitive hits or clear psychic downloads that someone is on the path to love or they’re headed in a great career trajectory. I read a friend of mine, who is a medium, and the words instantly popped into my head, “You’re about to ‘blow up’.” Those words were strangely specific, and when I shared them, she replied, “You’re the third reader to tell me that exact same thing, using those very words.” I joked that I hoped she’d remember me when she was famous.
But very often, these are not the right questions to ask because predictions are tricky, and they are often driven by fear.
In my personal experience, knowing a prediction sometimes alters the outcome. Whenever I’ve received a prediction from a psychic, it has often inspired in me a desire to take some action. Then, once I’ve taken some step, I am left wondering if my behavior, based on this knowledge, has now altered the outcome.
Or, in a philosophical puzzle, I might ask whether the prediction already took into account my knowledge and subsequent actions, and therefore taking those actions based on the knowledge of the prediction wouldn’t alter the outcome, but was in fact, central to the outcome.
In the past, when I would get predictions, I could easily go down a rabbit hole, wondering whether the prediction might be true only because the idea had been suggested to me, thereby inspiring actions, or the prediction knew the outcome by already anticipating those actions. In other words, I would get caught up in a chicken-or-egg conundrum of causality.
Or, if the prediction turned out not to be true or didn’t come to pass in the way it had been forecast, I might wonder whether knowing the outcome did in fact alter the way events unfolded. Perhaps I took steps to accelerate the outcome that led me in a different direction. I also had to ponder if the reader wasn’t very good and hadn’t forecasted accurately.
Either way, a prediction altered how I was relating to the present moment. That is, I was faced with a question, and after gaining information I took to be true about the future, I related to the present differently.
As I’ve switched roles and now routinely work with people who are seeking guidance about their spiritual path, I find myself in the awkward position of being asked whether I see money or honey in their future. I see the same tendencies that I saw in myself years ago — a desire for reassurance and a shift in how I related to the present moment once I had been given information.
Having been on both sides of the psychic’s table, so to speak, I now think that it’s far better to respond with a different question: “Who is asking about money or love?” The answer is invariably driven by a sense of fear or scarcity, and the person asking is almost always a version of the person from the past.
What I’ve seen over time is that if you don’t look at who's asking these questions and work with that version of yourself, it doesn’t matter what the prediction is. Even if money and love are in the future, you haven’t asked the question, “Do I keep them? Will the money or the honey last, and if so, for how long?”
One of the trickiest parts of psychic work is formulating the right question, and while everyone asks if love and money are coming, no one asks how long they stay. The answer to that question requires you to understand who is asking about them in the first place. If you don’t, the prediction might not matter. This is why many people who win the lottery end up losing all their money, or people go from relationship to relationship, always repeating the same patterns with similar people.
So I stopped many years ago asking about love or money and instead began the work of healing my relationship with them.
For me, I had to look at my family history, how they didn’t want to think about money yet constantly worried about it, often engaged in all sorts of strange rituals to try to make it appear yet lacked the most basic knowledge of money and investments. I had to look at my beliefs about money as something that invariably tied me to greed, corruption, or some other kind of unsavory business.
When it came to love, I had to look at the ways love as a kind of sacrifice, a negation of the self, was modeled for me, and how I saw my family members suppress themselves to make accommodations. I had to look in particular at my biological father and how love was filtered through intellect and how much my previous relationships had a certain kind of intellectual achievement as a precondition.
Now, when clients ask me about love or money, I don’t usually tell them the answer I’m getting, at least not right away. Instead, I ask, “Who wants to know and why?” I ask them to explore what part of them needs to heal so that they can create a different relationship with those concepts. If you want to ask a better question, you might ask, “What do I need to do to be someone who feels secure about love and money?” The answer to that question is often far more helpful than any prediction I can offer.
Thank you for reading my work. If you are interested in supporting my writing, please consider pre-ordering a copy of my forthcoming book, Endless Awakening: Time, Paradox, and the Path to Enlightenment. If you feel called to deepen your path, check out my private intuitive sessions and group online workshops on developing your intuition and learning to forgive.
