Ending the Homecoming Queen Habit
Five ways I learned to walk in God’s confidence
It was the fall of 1987 and I was sure I would be the Homecoming Queen.
After all, I had done all the things that sounded impressive: I was captain of the cheerleading squad, student body co-president, yearbook editor, and nice to almost everyone. I thought I was a shoo-in for Homecoming Queen. Until I wasn’t.
As I watched the school principal place the sparkly tiara on my friend’s head, I can remember the dark feeling and praying my face didn’t show it. I see the pictures now and while smiling jubilantly on the outside, I’m quietly dying on the inside.
Since that day more than 34 years later, I’m embarrassed to say part of my heart is still running for homecoming queen. Or at least the endlessly striving for approval part.
In truth, almost everyone wants to be liked. But for me, the incessant desire for validation carried an unhealthy and soul-crushing shadow. It became the perfect trap by the enemy to keep me chasing good works, exhaustedly hustling for affirmation. I was only as good as my next achievement, my next shiny work, or impressive deed. My approval act fueled a constant hungry desire for more and could never be satisfied.
