Is there an objective measure of Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence is a broad term that identifies our ability to be aware, make sense, regulate and respond effectively to our emotions.
IQ vs EQ
While IQ has been long used as a standard for evaluating an individual's intellectual capacity, EQ as a measure of human potential is gaining prominence in recent times. Check this out —
70% of customers and clients are found to be lost due to EI related issues
90% of what moves people up the ladder when IQ and technical skills are roughly similar is determined by EQ
81% of the competencies that distinguished outstanding managers were related to emotional intelligence
Employees with higher EQ earn 2.4X more in yearly salary across domains and technologies compared to low EQ counterparts
The Challenge
Since Emotional Intelligence deals with qualitative parameters like Awareness, Agility, Resilience, etc. there is a serious lack of a reliable way to measure or track EQ. This is where Self-Talk changes the way we have been perceiving Emotional Intelligence.
What is Self-Talk?
Self-Talk is our conscious thought process concerning our life, emotions, and actions. A typical person “self-talks” at the rate of 4000 words per minute. If we were to express all those words with our voice, it will take 1 hour. That’s how much information that is being processed as our “Inner Voice”.
How Self-Talk relates to Emotions?
While Emotions are the immediate way we understand sensory information (vision, smell, sounds, taste, etc.), Self-Talk is the transcriber of our emotions. Self-Talk is how we communicate our feelings and translate them into actions in everyday life.
Let’s say you are walking on a street and you unexpectedly bump into an old friend. You feel excited to see him after a long time. This is called the First Thought. Now, if you are aware a bit, you will realize that you have thoughts about this incident almost immediately. You might think “how did this guy come here”. Or “how long it has been since I met this person”. These are some examples of what we call Second Thoughts.
While the First Thought is your Emotion — your immediate feeling on encountering a friend, your second thought(s) is your Self-Talk. While First Thought can trigger Second Thoughts, the vice-versa is true as well. Positive or negative reinforcing self-talk statements that we repeat within ourselves can trigger relevant emotions.
Is self-talk a good indicator of our emotions?
Let’s say you are in a high-pressure situation such as playing a match, giving an interview, or about to do public speaking. During such intense moments, you are saying things to yourself that affect the outcome.
“Am I doing this right” is self-talk indicating confusion and lack of clarity. The more you think of such statements, the more anxious and nervous you start to get.
“How can I do this better” is self-talk indicating curiosity, openness, and a growth mindset.
Every statement we tell ourselves is an indication of how good we are at responding to our emotions. By measuring this, we can measure our Emotional Intelligence.
The first step to measuring EQ is, measuring our Self-Talk. Konvos has taken this first step already. By connecting the results of the Self-Talk assessment to specific Emotional Intelligence parameters like Emotional Awareness, Agility, etc., Konvos can help individuals to keep track of and improve their EQ. Few examples of how we do this —
Emotional Awareness
By being aware of our self-talk, we can be more aware of our emotions. By identifying different self-talk situations and allowing individuals to talk about these situations, Konvos enables individuals to track and improve their Emotional Awareness.
Emotional Control
One of the ways we can regulate our emotions is by distancing ourselves from destructive negative thoughts and disconnecting from them. Konvos enables this by providing the right “Reframing” technique to control self-critical Self-Talk.
Emotional Agility
One of the ways we at Konvos help people is by being able to move from negative self-talk to constructive self-talk at any point in time. By utilizing Reframing techniques, we help people build Emotional Agility in individuals.
What next?
Once you know your Self-Talk pattern, you can start taking specific steps to build effective Self-Talk that helps you break mental barriers. One of the ways we enable you to do this is through our Self-Talk training app. By connecting the results of the assessment to specific Emotional Intelligence parameters like Emotional Awareness, Agility, etc., Konvos can help individuals to keep track of and improve their EQ.
Sources:
- The Self talk tool
- Self-talk for anxiety relief and focus on Google Play and Apple Store.
- How to stop negative chatter in your head
- Talking out loud is a technology for thinking
- How emotions are made by Lisa Feldman Barrett
Harish is the co-creator of Konvos — the Self-Talk app for Emotional Health. An Emotionally driven Entrepreneur, Harish is defining what “Emotional Well-Being” means for Indian minds. Harish also authors “Emotion IS Intelligence” series on Medium.
