Open Letter to my Fiancé ‘s (Ex) Girlfriend: A Positive Approach
I will keep this as short and concise as much as I can since we live far apart from each other and don’t have the means to speak woman-to-woman — I am expecting that you’ll find this letter sooner or later or perhaps, spread like wildfire and gets “internet-popular” but I really do not care. I am only hoping for the best that it reaches you as I won’t tolerate the invasion of our lives by befriending people inside my circles and spreading ill-rumours anymore. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
I have been “counter-stalking” as I’ve known for a while that you’ve been searching my presence online, visited some of my personal blogsites and doing all the reconnaissance to the point where you are subconsciously being my “copycat”. You can deny all you want, yet my data logs do not lie. If you are still having assumptions on what I am or what I’m not capable to do….
I can tell you one thing: I know my way with computers.
Let us not beat around the bush on how I did it and and let me get straight to the point…
Most people experience heartbreaks, breakups and rejections at least once in their lifetime. It is worse when it is that “someone” whom we expected to be spending our lives with that inflicts the pain initially. I understand what you’re going through as I relived that pain many times.
I was 6 years single before I met your (ex), which is now my future fiancé and in all those years being alone, I tried to connect with people whose intentions did not match mine and it HURTS A LOT. but pointing fingers to escape the unfortunate truth that I am not wanted anymore doesn’t change the fact that they have chosen a greater person to date and all I can do is move on with my life. I’ve become more focused on my personal well-being and that alone, made me more confident and empowered to put myself more out there and learning not to have astronomical expectations on what relationships are supposed to be.
Yet, meeting your [now] ex-boyfriend fulfilled all that I wanted in a partner. As so to the answer to your mind-boggling question — -Your ex and I never done it behind your back. He is straightforward and is man enough to own up to his faults and this is what got me attracted and fall in love with him.
It might be a convenient theory to say that I took him away from you or he pursued me while you were still together but I just wanted to let you know my side of this story:
I never was attracted to him in the beginning. My feelings weren’t developed until later in our friendship, even made sure he wasn’t attached to anybody else including yourself before we even had our first kiss. Trust me, I know exactly what heartbreaks and breakups are and I can even tell you different types of rejection stories.
I have been cheated on before and there is no way in this world that I want to make another human to feel the same suffering out of spite. That is just way fucked up.
I am not here to make amends nor apologize in what “I-have-done-to-you” because that is just illogical to do as nobody owes an apology in your current situation. I am here to make you realize that you are better than this and that there was no overlap between our relationships. We may not be and will never be friends but my advice (which I am only repeating as I sent you this in the past) — -have at least, a little respect for yourself.
Again, I witnessed everything how he explained to you on the phone on why you had to part ways unlike the other story you have told me through a text message saying: “[He] left me, from the little info I have it seems he did that in part to be with you, I respect his decision.”
Girl, we both know that is not true.
I may not be one of the best psychoanalysts out there but I sort of have an idea now on how to describe why he stayed with you for almost a decade…
It is probably easy to manipulate words to keep him and perhaps other people wrap around your fingers but I do know that our differences starts at having more credibility by not playing the victim card to gain attention.
I still am waiting for that phone call thus, the reason why I have given my phone number since the day I contacted you for the first time and was eager to listen to why you also treated my then-boyfriend-now-fiance like your own piggy bank especially that time where you asked him to wire $250 USD for a non-existent illness of your dog, only for me to find out the same week the money that was asked was actually a bail for a (DUI) arrest.
My doors have been wide-open for your chance to speak up — you’ve stalked my online presence already, why not use it as means to convey your messages? I even suggested that you contact your (ex) boyfriend and as I am not one to judge nor do not have the right to as I strongly believe that there is always three sides of the story including the TRUTH.
….all I am waiting for is you tell openly your SIDE of things.
KRT_ (read as “Kurt or KRT underscore) is a polymath from NYC who is trying hard to write a masterpiece at her spare time. She makes music, art, photography and playing with computers whenever she doesn’t get caught up staring blankly at a wall. Tweet (@KRTNXTDOR) or recommend away.