I Want Coffee And Data Now!

It’s 7am, I need to get to work, and stayed up too late last night, again. I need coffee. Or more precisely, I need caffeine. What’s the fastest way to get it in my system ASAP? So I looked at the research:

*You’ll start feeling the effects sooner than we’ve listed here, but this is the time it takes for full absorption.

Well, the fastest way would be by intravenous injection. That would work almost instantly, but TBH I’m terrified of needles.

So it looks like my second best bet is a caffeinated chewing gum or toothpaste. I’ll start to feel it in just a few minutes, and it’ll reach a peak within as little as 22 minutes. The caffeine gets into our bloodstreams faster by going straight through the gums. The downside is I’ll need a little more caffeine to do the trick (because absorption is lower, around 70% vs. 100% for coffee), and the rush might fade quicker. It’s also pretty tough to figure out how much caffeine I’d be getting from the toothpaste, since they don’t list a dosage.

If I’ve got a long commute or I’m really tired, then a morning cup of coffee might still be the best bet. It takes around 8 minutes longer than gum to start working, but I can reach maximum alertness within about half an hour, and the effects will last longer. A typical cup has about 80 mg of caffeine, which is just the right amount for me. Bonus: I get that awesome coffee flavor.

And unless I want to try to snooze for another hour, then wake up ready to bolt out the door, it looks like caffeine pills just aren’t a good option. They taste terrible, take around an hour and a half to reach full efficacy, and can make me feel really jittery. That’s probably because each pill is 200 mg, equal to two and a half cups of coffee all at once. No thanks, I’ve been down that road before.

So, how do you like to get your early-morning fix?

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

If you learned something from this story, please click the ❤ below. Comment if you’ve got any questions, and follow us at Labdoor for updates!

One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.