“DID THEY REALLY JUST SAY THAT?!” DEALING WITH MICROAGGRESSIONS AT WORK
Have you ever experienced people at work come and ask you, or say things along the lines of -
“Wow, you speak English so well — I’m surprised”
“You don’t look like you’re from ___”
“So, like where are you REALLY from?”
“Can I call you ___ for short?”
If your answer is yes, to any of these, then you may have faced a form of Microaggression. This term was first introduced by psychiatrist and Harvard University professor Chester M. Pierce in 1970. Simply put — these comments, attitudes and behaviours can be offensive and insensitive, and make the target person / group feel undermined in some way. They essentially reflect underlying assumptions based on some element of one’s identity.
A Few Facts:
Microaggressions are more common than we think them to be — A 2019 glass door survey of 1,100 US employees found that 61% of US employees have witnessed or experienced workplace discrimination based on age, race, gender, or LGBTQ identity. While generally discussed in the context of race, ethnicity etc., microaggressions can take shape because of any differences or historically held beliefs about a group.
Another fact about microaggressions — We all may be guilty of it and even unaware that at some point in our lives, we have communicated in ways that could have been perceived as a microaggression.
Its Negative Impact:
As the name suggests, microaggressions may seem small or insignificant in the beginning, but if continued over time, can negatively impact the person/people it is targeted towards. For example, researchers who studied the impact of microaggressions on students found that they continuously suffered from low self-esteem.
The impact of such behaviours is debilitating because they make us feel excluded, leading to emotions such as feeling unappreciated, anger and rage. It also consumes “cognitive resources” as we try to understand what was said / what just happened.
Needless to say that microaggressions have a deep impact on the culture and foundation of the overall organisation. It negatively impacts the way people communicate and collaborate with each other which invariably affects performance. Most importantly, microaggressions are a big obstacle in the organisation’s attempts to create and sustain an inclusive culture where people feel safe.
Responding to Microaggressions:
We often reflect on these micro behaviours and attitudes, and think to ourselves “I should have said that!” or “I wish I wouldn’t have reacted that way”.
You might be tempted to call it out, like you would if someone said something overtly offensive; but in reality this would likely worsen the impact. But there are ways we can successfully respond to and address such comments and behaviours.
Leaders can be powerful drivers of change in their organisations. By being aware of some of their own unconscious biases, and leading with empathy, they can inspire positive change. Remember, you have a voice that many will listen to.
Actions Leaders can Take When Dealing with Microaggressive Behaviours:
- Listen deeply: When a team member(s) chooses to share an experience they had, try to understand them instead of getting defensive or playing the devil’s advocate.
- Accept your flaws: Be prepared to rethink much of what you thought to be true about the world and your workplace. It may feel uncomfortable at first to challenge your own beliefs and behaviours, but this process will help you build a more inclusive culture where your team feels safe and brings their best selves to work.
- Coach your teams: Guide your employees and empower them to voice their experiences and concerns in a productive way. Here are some actions/steps you can work with them on:
Impact Vs Intent: People often feel that their intentions are enough to justify what they say or do. But do intentions really matter if our actions have the impact of making someone feel hurt, excluded or oppressed in any way? It is important to always emphasise the impact over intent.
Focus on the action and not the person. Focusing on the action gives us the opportunity to address it. Focusing on the person, such as shaming or blaming them, may not leave the door open to work through things, and the conversation stops there.
Wait and listen. You may be met with defensiveness at first. But make sure you listen, as you are likely to address the issue at hand.
Seek out your support system: Microaggressive behaviours can make you feel like you don’t belong. In these moments, seeking your trusted group of colleagues at work — talking to them about how you feel or simply surrounding yourself with them can help you feel a sense of upliftment and security.
Engage in self-care: As cliche as it sounds, self-care strategies such as mindfulness, meditation or practicing healthy sleep habits are important as they help reduce stress and create a sense of positivity.
We spend a large amount of our time interacting with people at work — let’s commit to treat one another with a large and open mind, not a micro one.