Fake It Until You Make It
Staying authentic while “faking it” by Nevena Djaja
Fake it until you make it: a phrase often used when we’re not feeling confident about something or we’re taking on something that we’ve never done before. It’s good advice — a little faking can be a lifesaver in many professional and personal situations. The phrase itself started as a result of an experiment that Stephanie L. Stolz conducted at the Missouri Western State University in 2009. It basically found that when people are encouraged to believe in their own abilities (even if they don’t necessarily have the skills) they perform better. You can read more about the experiment here.
We can apply this advice even better by not only “faking it” but at the same time staying true to ourselves. Oftentimes we need to embrace our fears, accept the anxiety around doing new things and try our best to be honest and authentic. What does it mean to be authentic? Wikipedia calls it “the degree to which one is true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character, despite external pressures.” So many external pressures are upon us, pushing us to be successful and accomplished — sometimes according to other peoples’ expectations and definitions of success. When you fake it, do it for the right reasons and according to your own terms, not to conform to the standards of others. As with most things in life, there is no one-size-fits-all version of success. Find the one that feels most right for you.
Some time in 2011 I changed my career to a full-time web developer. I jumped in with both feet, at a time when I wasn’t completely comfortable speaking English. My coworkers were more senior and I was very self-conscious of my inexperience, barely saying a word in meetings. I would sit small and curled up in my chair. I was afraid that saying something wrong would expose my shortcomings. It didn’t help much that all of my coworkers were men — it was hard to get the floor to begin with. In my first performance review I was told that I wasn’t good at communicating the work I was doing or the ideas I had for solving problems. It was a low point in my life. Worrying about looking bad was holding me and my potential down. I decided to take a risk and started to speak up. It wasn’t easy and was fairly awkward at times, but my confidence level grew over time as I built up my skills. It took a little bit of faking it to get over the hump, but now I’m known for saying what’s on my mind without worrying too much about other peoples’ standards. It led to being promoted to senior developer, and being chosen to lead 2 major projects in the company.
Next time you are giving a speech, or are in a big meeting where everyone is senior to you, try some “faking” to cover up the anxiety and fear. It can save you from appearing nervous and as though you’re not up for the challenge. Also remind yourself that you are on your way to acquiring the abilities that you don’t have yet. Make sure to do a little check in your head before you show up, in order to be authentic according to your own standards.
