“Here I Am”: Decoding Leadership Presence

Lean In Network Bangalore Group Picture from the workshop

For the longest time, I thought leadership presence was synonymous with being the person who turned heads. From Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada to Rajni Kant in all his movies, leadership presence seemed to be the sublime sauce that made someone stand out. Only a few people seemed to possess it, and it put them head and shoulders above everyone else.

As I built my career, I realized that leadership presence also influenced progressions across levels. I wondered if it could be cultivated or if it largely revolved around appearance and expressions. To complicate matters, leadership manifests in multiple styles, which undermined my attempts at learning it through observation.

Then, on a sunny Saturday afternoon, as I sat through Lean In Network Bangalore’s workshop on leadership presence, the haze lifted. Vandana Balakrishna, CEO at Marketboats Consulting and a leadership coach at Navgati, demystified leadership presence for the community. Here are my five key takeaways from the scintillating conversations that transpired:

1. There is more to leadership presence than turning heads. The ability to turn heads is the tip of the iceberg. Leadership presence goes beyond appearance and is about how you make people feel around you. It is the ability to inspire trust, the ability to stay calm under pressure, the ability to engage respectfully with a critic, and the ability to communicate effectively. In essence, it is the ability to stay secure and confident in our own worth and capabilities, especially when faced with curve balls.
   It reminded me of the famed piece of (gendered) poetry by Rudyard Kipling called “IF”. The message applies equally to everyone

Poetry by Rudyard Kipling “IF”

2. There is no one-size-fits-all magic formula: Leadership presence is an extension of our own leadership style. You could have a larger-than-life presence that inspires awe (like Meryl Streep or Narendra Modi), or you could have a quiet presence that speaks volumes (like Barack Obama or Jacinda Arden). This means each one of us has the opportunity to curate a leadership presence that truly reflects our values and personal brand.

However, there is also a “stage” component to it. Certain roles need a certain energy, and if we are aspiring for those roles, we will need to either:

• expand our repertoire and perform for the stakeholders, or
• build an inner circle that manages the stage while you focus on other elements

3. Like any other skill, it can be cultivated and honed. Vandana spoke about Sylvia Ann Hewitt’s work around executive presence and distilled it into three key components: gravitas, communication, and appearance (see image). Gravitas is expertise, or knowing our stuff. It is the ability to go six questions deep in our domain. Communication is the ability to speak with confidence and conviction. Appearance is a signaling mechanism for credibility and hence becomes important for leaders who are breaking the mold.

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewitt

While appearance and communication are easier to master, gravitas takes time to hone. My curiosity led me to Sylvia Ann Hewitt’s book, where she mentions eight key ways of deepening gravitas.

Picture and Emphasis by Ozii Obiyo on Ozisco.com

4. Leadership presence happens in the “here and now" and then turns into stories: The true power of leadership presence lies in its ability to transcend moments and turn them into lores that are passed through the grapevine. The way our personal brand reaches people even when we are not in the room, our leadership presence, can elevate us by virtue of being recounted through moments of impact.

It is the little “here and now” moments when we keep our smile and cool. It is those moments where we resonate with someone so deeply that they feel compelled to reach out. It is those moments when we truly let ourselves be human without worrying about judgment.

Vandana spoke about moments in her career that people remembered even years after they happened. In this context, she also introduced us to the PRES Model by Kathy Lubar and Belle Linda Halpern which says that leadership presence is underpinned by four key elements:

• The ability to be Present in the moment and retain the flexibility to handle the unexpected
• The ability to Reach out and nurture relationships is built on empathy, listening, and authentic connections. It is the ability to stay human.
• The ability to Express congruently through words, body language, and emotions. It is a combination of security, confidence, and comfort in oneself, which brings up the fourth element
• The ability to be Self-knowing— acknowledging and accepting ourselves for who we are and committing to becoming the best version of ourselves. It reflects authenticity through congruent values, decisions, and actions.

Excerpt from Leadership Presence by Belle Linda Halpern and Kathy Lubar

Beyond the models, we also decoded and analyzed elements of leadership presence across a range of diverse leaders. As we debated what worked (and what didn’t) in the Indian context, we stumbled into the rabbit hole of vulnerability. The group spoke about how their moments of vulnerability were used against them at their workplace and left them conflicted about how to be authentic while protecting themselves. This brings us to my fifth takeaway from the session

5. Vulnerability without boundaries is not vulnerability. This interesting piece of advice comes from Brene Brown. Vandana shared that vulnerability needs to start with setting boundaries and examining our own motivations behind sharing something.

In her book, “Dare to Lead”, she says, “Vulnerability without boundaries is not vulnerability. It might be fear or anxiety. We have to think about why we’re sharing and, equally important, with whom. What are their roles? What is our role? Is this sharing productive and appropriate? Vulnerability is not a sympathy-seeking tool, nor is it something used to manipulate and shirk responsibility.”

The workshop was filled with ideas that stewed for weeks in my head. Beyond the enthralling conversations, it was filled with connections and passionate discussions. It was filled with warmth and energy that come from being part of a community that seeks to grow together. Here’s to more such meet-ups: may we organize them, may we attend them, and may we get others to continue building the sisterhood.

Here are some additional resources that could help build further from here:

1. Talk at Google by Sylvia Ann Hewitt. It is a crash course in the key messages that she expounds on in her book. Think of it as an hour-long investment.
2. Vulnerability, not over-sharing: A Ted Talk by Brene Brown that expands on the idea of establishing boundaries and reflection rituals before opening up
3. Develop your signature voice: In this interactive HBR webinar, Amy Jen Su and Muriel Wilkins—co-authors of Own the Room—share a compelling framework for developing our powerful personal presence.

If you need someone to hold your hand through these, reach out to our Lean in Bangalore sisterhoods (we thrive on WhatsApp; email us for details), or even better, get a coach (we run a pro-bono coaching program for our community three times a year).