Game of Thrones & the Women of Westeros 5/3
“The High Sparrow” and pals start a coup in King’s Landing, we finally see Winterfell again, and Arya tries to become No One.
Previously…
The credits take us to the usual places as well as Moat Cailin, which means we’ll be seeing a certain sadistic bastard… and his bastard. I covered “The House of Black and White” here and now we’ll finally see inside it! Fingers crossed it’s dank, dark, and drippy!
In a nutshell…
Oh, look! It is! The House of Black an White (henceforth the HOBAW to save time) is not just dark and with dripping noises, but there are dying people and fire pits in the walls. Not!Jaqen is giving some old man water, they’re all “Valar Morghulis/Valar Dohaeris” while Arya sweeps the floor. Apparently she’s been doing it for days and tells Not!Jaqen this job sucks. When does she get to change faces? He reminds her “all men must serve,” that she must become no one, and that there is only one god and we all know his gift (and what we say to him: “Not today.” I wish. I miss Syrio). This place is so disturbingthat it looks like it’s today for all the residents). Not!Jaqen walks off and Arya asks where they’re taking the old man with no answer.
The royal party is being carried through beautiful downtown King’s Landing in their boxes to what sounds like an equal measure of “boos” and people shouting out love for Queen Margaery. You can imagine how Cersei feels about that. We see both a wedding and a wedding night finish up. It’s also a little creepy, yet sweet because Tommen’s a nice kid, but he’s still barely out of his preteens. He’s infatuated with Margaery, which is just as she wants it as she spends the wedding night complimenting his poor, aged, overworked mother, who should really have a break far away.
The next day, Cersei is complimenting Margaery to Tommen, talking about how pretty she is, even if she’s not very bright. She doesn’t get to her point before Tommen brings up her being happier back home at Casterly Rock. Margaery is gossiping with her giggling maids about the wedding night when Cersei comes in. They throw seemingly polite shade. Margaery wins this round, asking if Cersei prefers Queen Mother or Dowager Queen or Queen Grandmother, soon enough. Cersei walks off to the sound of giggling maids, looking super pissed.
Moat Cailin is festive as usual, flayed men and flies dancing in the wind. Roose and The Bastard have a little chat and we find the flayed men were a Stark loyalist and his family who refused to pay taxes to the Boltons. Roose thinks The Bastard is going too far, but lets it go because Roose is more focused on arranging a wife for Ramsay, thinking an alliance will get the Northerners on board more than just skinning everyone who disagrees.
So this is the marriage proposal Littlefinger was so happy about. I thought he might have been getting permission to wed her himself to hold the Eyrie and Winterfell. I mean… ew. But Ramsay makes Littlefinger look like a catch among the eligible bachelors of Westeros. Sansa says she’ll die first, but Littlefinger convinces her this is how she can stop being a bystander and do something. “You loved your family. Avenge them.” Sansa finally goes along.
Pod and Brienne are still following at a distance. Brienne sort of apologies for her fit of the grumps lately and talks about training Pod to ride and fight like a knight. We learn how Pod was squire to a knight who stole and was sent to Tyrion to punish the both of them. Laugh’s on Tywin because Pod liked Tyrion. Brienne opens up about her past, how she knew Renly was same-sex oriented, but she loved him for how he comforted her and danced with her when all the other boys mocked her for being “a great, lumbering beast” at her ball. “He saved me from being a joke from that day until his last day and I couldn’t save him in return. Nothing’s more hateful than failing to protect the one you love.” She knows it was Stannis and vows revenge.
Setting up revenge seems to be the theme for this one. At the Wall, Stannis tries to convince Jon to take his offer and ditch being Lord Commander to avenge his family. Jon heavily hints that Stannis should move on and leave the Brothers to stay out of the wars and guard the realms of men. Davos thinks the realms of men are in danger from more than what’s beyond the wall. “As long as the Boltons hold the north, the north will suffer.” Jon ponders that as well as Stannis’ advice to send Alliser Thorne away to Eastwatch.
Back at the HOBAW, some skinny, bossy girl they’re calling The Waif is hitting Arya, calling her a liar when Arya says she’s No One. Arya’s about to grab Needle and give her the old what-for when Not!Jaqen comes to break it up and guilt trip Arya for claiming to be no one while still having Arya Stark’s clothes and possessions.
In a scene that murders my feelings, Arya goes out to the docks in a rag dress and sinks her clothes to the bottom of the bay with a rock. She starts to toss in Needle, but the both of us start crying, so she hides it inside a pile of rocks on a hillside instead. Back inside, Arya goes back to sweeping until The Waif takes her to an inner chamber, where Jaqen leaves them with a dead body to wash. What a fun new career! Arya asks what they do with the bodies after washing, but The Waif doesn’t answer.
We finally see Winterfell again as Sansa is welcomed (to her own damned home!) by Roose and Ramsay. Ramsay’s sadistic harem looks on angrily as he kisses her hand. The servant who shows her to her room welcomes her more warmly and assures her “the North remembers.”
At the Wall dining hall, the men laugh as Jon assigns latrine duty to a ginger. He goes against Stannis’ advice and gives Thorne First Ranger, which I think is good of him. It might even soothe Thorne’s ego. He decides to order Janos Slynt away to Grayguard, wherever that is. Janos refuses and tells Jon where he can shove his order. Treason! Off with his head! For real! Slynt mouths off till he’s on the block and Jon asks for his last words, then he begs for mercy. “I’m afraid. I’ve always been afraid,” he snivels. Jon hesitates for second, then refuses to give in to pity and swings the sword himself as his “father” would have (Yes. I put father in quotes, more on that below). Stannis, who’s been watching, gives him a little approving glance.
In Littlefinger’s brothel, the supposedly chaste High Septon is role playing with prostitutes dressed as The Seven. As this is tantamount to a Cardinal and hookers dressed like the Trinity over here, I kind of agree when the Lancel and the Sparrows (Groovy 60s band name!) bust in to stop the blasphemy and hypocrisy, then parade him naked through the streets. I don’t agree with them beating on poor Olyvar and the hookers! The Septon might be shitting on his job, but they’re doing theirs perfectly! Anyway, the Septon whines to Cersei and the council. She doesn’t care, but decides to meet with the High Sparrow, anyhow.
It’s Jonathon Pryce! He’s very monk-like, poor and barefoot and feeding the starving and, from the look on Cersei’s face, smelly. He talks about everyone being equal in the eyes of the Seven and how he values poverty and hates hypocrisy. She’s not going to execute him as the High Septon wants, in fact she arrested the Septon. She claims to agree with his views and leaves him to ponder an alliance, then goes to see Maester Mad Scientist to send a raven to Littlefinger, “wherever he’s slithering about.” The Mountain’s body, still under a sheet, stirs. Ew.
At Winterfell, Reek/Theon hides from Sansa as she passes him and Ramsay and Littlefinger discuss the upcoming marriage, with Ramsay putting on the besotted suitor act. Roose and Littlefinger go off to discuss the marriage more, Littlefinger assuring them Sansa’s marriage to Tyrion was unconsummated and invalid. Roose thinks the Lannisters might kick up a fuss over them wedding Sansa to Ramsay, but Littlefinger says the Lannisters are losing street cred with Tywin dead, Jaime one-handed, Tommen being a “soft boy,” and Margaery, who likes Sansa, placed above Cersei. Roose is still suspicious as Cersei’s message has come for Littlefinger and he feels less secure without Tywin backing him. He wants to read Littlefinger’s reply to Cersei.
Then we’re on the road with Tyrion and Varys. They’re still arguing about Tyrion wanting to get out of the wheelhouse. Tyrion says he’s going insane and will be no use to anyone if that happens. Varys lets him out and they move through the city. There’s a Red Pristess, one of Melisandre’s buddies, proselytizing about both R’hlorr and the mother of Dragons (OMG, Dany! Don’t align yourself with that religion! They burn everyone for no good reason!). Tyrion and the priestess exchange a strangely long look.
Tyrion finds, of course, a brothel, where quite a few of the women are dressed up like Daenerys. “Someone who inspires priests and whores is worth taking seriously,” Varys says. Tyrion goes off to “speak to someone with hair.” He doesn’t have any money, but he does sweet talk a prostitute (It’s Marnie from Misfits!) into giving him a freebie, then finds nothing stirring downstairs. After going outside for a leak, he finds there’s hope, but Jorah Mormont (!!!) sneaks behind him and trusses him up. “I’m taking you to the queen,” he says before carrying him off. Which one?
Passing The Bechdel Test…
Arya and The Waif help us pass this time. If it weren’t for that, I’d say Cersei and Margaery’s talk would have worked. It may have been about Tommen on the surface, but it was all about their power struggle and position underneath.
The Women of Westeros…
It was tough to see Arya crying. It’s something we haven’t seen since her father’s execution. Her eyes might water. here and there, but she never lets loose a tear. I think she’s been too overwhelmed, plotting revenge, and desperately saying “not today” to the God of Death. Now she’s finally in a place she is safe, but she has to give the last piece of who she is. Needle has represented security and purpose for her ever since Jon gave it to her. Considering, Arya’s supposed to be thirteen or so, this is a lot to take on or give up. Besides revenge driving so many characters, I’d say that a running theme is compromising who you are to get what you want.
Sansa definitely has that struggle and proves stronger, if you want to call it that, than Arya. You see her distaste about having to play nicey nice with the Boltons, but she chooses to shut away the part of herself that wants to spit in their faces. I love the moment where she stares off, then resolutely joins Littlefinger. She’s hardening and it’s interesting to watch, especially since Show Sansa caught up with Book Sansa as of last season. It looks like Show Sansa is taking the arc of another character, but more on that in notes.
Margaery was DELIGHTFUL, throwing all kinds of nasty and never losing that smile. That’s just top drawer shade. I still find her and Tommen creepy as all hell, though. There was this tiny part of me that hoped she’d kiss him on the cheek and call it consummation, then give him a new kitten friend for Ser Pounce. He’s really, really sweet and stupid! He’d totally go for it and call it the best wedding night ever! Ah, well. It happened. Crazy enough, I think she’d make a good queen. She does try to give to the poor, even if it is for appearances.
Cersei did seem a bit deflated in this episode, just taking all Margaery’s elderly jabs with barely a glare up until her meeting with the High Sparrow. It’s obvious she can’t compete with what Margaery’s giving Tommen, but she’s not giving up. I don’t know what she thinks aligning with the Jim Jones of Westeros will do for her. We’ll see…
Brienne’s story touched me. being a girl who went through similar experiences (boys can be cruel). Gwendoline Christie is a gorgeous woman and, you’d think, entirely too pretty to play a part with a past of pain and mockery over her looks, but the show dirties her up and her acting sells it and I’m suddenly crying for a six-foot-something blonde. I find the differences between her and Arya, as Action Girls, fascinating. Arya refuses to show vulnerability to the point where you believe she has none, even though she’s still a child. Brienne is a grown woman and her pain is right under the surface, almost waiting for someone to scratch at it and bring it to light.
I wondered whether I should include The Waif as a woman. Much like I theorize Not!Jaqen is just wearing a handy face (and who knows who is underneath?), I think The Waif could be a grown woman or even a man in the HOBAW, putting on the guise of a young girl to be approachable for Arya as she adjusts. Either way, I don’t think that little whipping session was genuine and I think Jaqen broke it up right on cue. The Waif is a scripted character in the HOBAW, an alliance and an obstacle for the newbies, a step along the way to becoming No One.
We get to see smiley Walda Frey again. I don’t know what that girl has to smile about, tied up with the Boltons. Then again, I don’t think her father’s house was much better.
Other notes…
I wonder if Jon knew Slynt would kick up a fuss about being sent away and that it would lead to the block. By taking matters into his own hands, he’s exacted direct revenge for the way Slynt turned his City Watch men on Ned way back in season one, slaughtering all the Stark men. And I’ve never forgiven him for murdering all of Robert’s bastards, even a baby! I don’t know how much Jon knows about the extent of Slynt’s crimes in King’s Landing, though. Either way, Jon’s rid of Slynt undermining him at every turn and I don’t have to see his sneering face anymore. Win/win!
I haven’t talked much about the prevailing fan theories here, but I’m sure everyone knows about the one that might leave me in doubt of Jon being Ned’s son. I am so sure this particular theory is true, mostly due to an interview GRRM himself gave last summer. The long and short was that a good deal of people have figured out one of the long-standing twists of the series and he actually considered changing it just to be petulant, but claims he won’t. Oh, George!
I know I like to emphasize that the show is not the book, but I do find the economizing they’re doing interesting. I don’t think I’m spoiling anything for book virgins, if I say Sansa Stark is taking the Jeyne Pool arc, at least on the surface, especially since the show didn’t really have Jeyne Pool exist as more than an extra. Much like how Ellaria is given Arianne Martell’s place. I see why with both. Rather than invest us in another character in a crowded universe, they decide to have events play out with someone we already feel invested in. But Jeyne was posing as Arya and her marriage to Ramsay gave him an illegitimate claim to the north. Marrying Sansa would actually give him a true claim we don’t want him to have. I don’t know. I’ll see how things play out. Either way, Sansa’s much more interesting to watch when she’s not a bystander. Littlefinger hit that note for sure.
Fangasms…
Arya calls The Waif a cunt. Professor Hound’s language lessons certainly took. I’ve never liked the C word, but much like when The Hound used it, I just let out a horrified giggle. I guess it’s all in delivery and intent. Something about The Hound’s calm disdain for the men at the inn then and Arya’s startled squeak here took the sting out of it for me.
I love “the North remembers.” I am going to remind myself to use it whenever my family picks on me. I’m convinced it will be chilling whether they get the reference or not.
And now for more pretties I didn’t have time for…
Next Up: “Sons of the Harpy”
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