Game of Thrones & the Women of Westeros 5/7 and 5/8
“The Gift” is okay, but “Hardhome” is what I’ve been waiting for!
Previously…
My apologies for the double recap. I was operating under the delusion there was no show last week due to Memorial Day Weekend and decided to write a thinky piece on the show’s handling of Jeyne/Sansa as a placeholder. Next time, I’ll get my info from somewhere besides Twitter. Anyway, I went into Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken” here.
In two nutshells…
Here, I thought The Gift was going to be all about the land stretching north of The Wall, but we don’t venture north of the wall at all. I guess they’re saving that up. Anyway, at The Wall, Jon is about to head off with Tormund to gather Wildlings against Walkers. Thorne and Olly both give him dirty looks, but Sam gives him some dragonglass, hoping he doesn’t have to use it. Maester Aemon is on his deathbed, enjoying some time with “Gillyflower” and Little Sam, reminiscing about his little brother, Aegon, or “Egg.” He warns Gilly to get south before it’s too late. Later, he drifts in and out of the past. Gilly predicts Sam will have to speak for his funeral tomorrow, which he does, and it’s very lovely…
…until Thorne ruins it by reminding Sam he’s fresh out of friends at The Wall with Jon and now Aemon gone. Later, this point is illustrated by two of the men sexually harassing Gilly, then attempting to take it further. Sam comes in to defend her, but one begins to beat him to a pulp while the other holds Gilly back from defending Sam. It seems like they’ve rendered him unconscious, if not dead, but Sam gets up, ready to fight or die trying. Luckily, Ghost decides to make a an appearance then, chasing the men off (MORE DIREWOLVES, SHOW!). At least Sam and Gilly have one very useful friend left.
Gilly tends his wounds and tells him not to be a hero if that happens again, but he jokes he had them right where he wanted them and he’d do it again. It’s kind of sweet, how both of them only care what happens to the other. They seal their nerdy love (and get rid of Sam’s virginity) fully clothed (it can be done!), sweet, terribly awkward, unsexy scene. Sam even says “Oh, my!”
In Winterfell, Reek brings food to Sansa, who’s being kept like some sort of combo of prisoner and brood mare, locked up and weeping. She pressures Reek to light that candle like Mrs. North-Remberton said, tells him he’s Theon Greyjoy, last surviving son of Balon Greyjoy, lord of the Iron Islands, that he owes her for betraying her family. Reek does climb a tower just to mess with my hopes, but it’s the wrong one. He’s gone to Ramsay.
Ramsay lets Sansa out for a little talk on the snowy battlements. He’s awful, bragging about how the storm will protect them from Stannis and they’ll be Ward and Wardeness of the North. Sansa grabs what looks like a corkscrew to me and decides to get a little of her own back by reminding him Walda might have a trueborn son and Ramsay’s naturalization by Tommen is suspect, considering Tommen’s “another bastard.” Ramsay gets the upper hand back by informing her that Reek told him of her candle in the window, then shows her what’s left of Mrs. North-Rememberton (NOOOOO!!!). He had her skinned for information, but she died before giving anything up. Sansa looks destroyed as she’s led back to her prison. I’m just glad she got that corkscrew. Is she going to corkscrew him in the neck? I’d be cool with that as long as she did it several other places first and very slowly.
At snowy Camp Stannis, Davos informs him that men are starving, horses are dying, and the sell-swords have abandoned them. Davos wants them to retreat to the Wall for the winter. But winter may be years in this world. Stannis will march, whether to victory or defeat. I’m kind of enjoying Stannis this season. Mel reassures him that she saw the Bolton banners fall at Winterfell in the flames, but wonders if they need more king’s blood to make it happen. Basically, she wants to sacrifice Shireen like she wanted to do with Gendry. Stannis refuses and kicks her out of the tent. Go, Stannis! I’m afraid he’ll reconsider if things get worse, but for now… Go, Stannis!
Then we’re across the sea, where Jorah is being successfully auctioned off to Tyrion’s dismay. Tyrion insists they’re a fighting team and beats the poor sap who’s been holding his chain to prove it. Everyone seems to find this amusing, including Jorah’s new owner, who gives the auctioneer some coin for the package deal. Tyrion, for some reason, decides to get philosophical about how Meereen is a free city these days. Shouldn’t they be freed men given fair wages? The man punches him, then tosses him and Jorah a coin.
In Meereen, Dany and Daario are basking the sweaty afterglow while Daario tries to convince her to marry him instead of Hizdahr. She turns him down, so he has another winning suggestion: gather all the men of the great families at the opening of the fighting pits and kill them all. She doesn’t think that’s such a brilliant idea, either. “I’m a queen, not a butcher.”
In King’s Landing, we finally see a bright shining light in this desolate wasteland. They call her The Queen of Thorns! She goes to The High Sparrow and they kind of bond about joint pain and their nicknames, but she cuts to the chase soon enough. She questions his sincerity, considering he’s doing Cersei’s “dirty work.” She wants her grandkids freed and she’ll pay, but The Sparrow can’t be bought. She thinks their crimes are small compared to the other shit that goes down in King’s Landing. She totally has a point, but he thinks all crimes are equal. She tries another tack, pointing out that King’s Landing is only fed through High Garden’s generosity. That doesn’t work on him, either. “You are the many. We are the few and, when the many stop fearing the few…” He leaves it at the implication.
One of her men hands her a scroll with a black seal as she leaves to meet Littlefinger, sadly roaming his ransacked brothel. She’s not into the locale, but gets past it to berate him for being duplicitous and thinks it’s a bad turn after she helped him murder a king. He doesn’t completely deny it, claiming he had no choice but to hand Cersei Olyvar’s intel, but he offers Olenna another “pretty young man” to even things out.
In other parts, Tommen is teen angsting about his queen being locked up and him being powerless. Cersei gives him a speech about not blaming himself for fate. He rants about calling in the army to take back the sept and rescue his maiden, but that’s as far as it goes. Cersei promises to “help” get her out and then there’s a fairly tender moment, where she goes into all she would do to protect him and his sister. It would be much sweeter if she hadn’t also tried to poison him that one time.
Speaking of his sister, Myrcella goes to see Uncle Jaime in his luxurious prison quarters and wonders why he tried to take her from Trystane. She’s been in Dorne for years now, she loves Trystane, she wants to stay, and Jaime doesn’t know her at all! In less luxurious cells, Bronn is singing a bawdy song about “The Dornishman’s Wife” to The Sandsnakes’ annoyance, except Obaram who’s glad for the entertainment. Nymeria belittles his fighting skills and he claims he doesn’t like hurting women, not even them, then goes on about the beautiful women of Dorne, them excluded.
Tyene take offense and presents her boobs. Sometimes I wish this show was on basic cable or something, where we could still get all the fighty bits, but I’d be saved from all the boobs. This is the flimsiest excuse for boobs I’ve ever seen on this show. Yes, Show. I’m sure they’re very nice. Now put them away — though I do like the way her sisters roll their eyes, all “Someone’s saying Tyene’s not the prettiest princess. Here we go…” She asks how his wounded arm is and his head, pretends sympathy when he starts to swoon. She reveals her weapon was coated with a poison that will shortly kill him and pulls a vial from around her neck with the antidote. She makes him tell her she’s the most beautiful woman in the world before giving it to him and saying he’s cute, too. Hmmm. This exchange might not have been completely pointless. More on that below.
In some dungeon, Jorah’s new owner is pep-talking the first round of fighters in the… fighting pit semi-finals, I guess. He’s all “Valar Morghulis” and they’re all “Yeah, yeah, Valar Dohaeris, whatever.” Heh. In an interesting turn of events, Dany and her new consort, Hizdahr, show up to honor them with an audience. That owner is certainly excited, straightening up the men and doing all but busting out the good china. Jorah hears them saluting the queen outside and fanboys a bit before grabbing some weapons and a face-obscuring helm and getting into the fray.
Dany has not been enjoying all the neck-stabbing, knee-slicing fun. She wants to leave, but pays closer attention when the new guy starts making quick (and not egregiously bloody or murdery) work of everyone else in the arena. Meanwhile, Tyrion’s been trying to file his chains to stay close to Jorah when one of the other fighters helps him out. Must be one the rare people in Westeros who doesn’t hate dwarfs.
When Jorah is the last man standing, he unhelms himself and Dany stiffens and orders him taken away, but he’s all “Khaleeeesseeee!” (I’ve kind of missed hearing that word) Tyrion rushes out and the above happens. Jaw on the floor, y’all. More on why below.
In the sept’s jail, Cersei visits Margaery to bring her leftovers (From last night! The gall!) and lord it over her. Margaery doesn’t buy her pretend pity and calls her a “hateful bitch.” Cersei’s in full smug mode when she goes to The Sparrow to talk about the upcoming trial and he informs her they could confess and rely on the mercy of the Mother, provided they’re judged to be sincere.
She’s ready for a holier-than-all tête-à-tête. He indulges her at first, going on about simpler septs without gold and ornaments. The Tyrell’s finery will be stripped away,” he says, then wonders “What will we find when we strip away your finery?” He then drops the hammer, talking about a young man who finally unburdened himself to him… about her. I guess Littlefinger came through with that “pretty young man” for Olenna. He calls in Lancel and, considering they indulged in incestuous adultery and wining Robert to death together, she knows the jig is up. She tries to call out “I am the queen!” as a large septa takes her away, but it works about as well as it did for Margaery. She’s tossed into a cell.
The next episode opens on Daenerys, standing judgment over Tyrion and Jorah. She shushes Jorah, but seems interested in Tyrion and why she should let him live after the Lannisters betrayed and killed most of her family. He points out that he killed his mother at birth and his father fairly recently. “I am the greatest Lannister killer of all time.” She points out that killing his own family doesn’t exactly recommend him to her service. “Your grace, we’ve only just met,” he snarks, “it’s too soon to know if you deserve my service.” She threatens him with a return to the fighting pits. He ignores the threat and tells her what he knows of her: born in turmoil, used as a bargaining chip, sold into marriage, now with an army, dragons, and considered the last hope for a better world (by Varys implied). She asks what he’s worth. He says he knows the political landscape, was a good Hand, and could do better as Hand to a ruler who deserves it (more than Joffrey implied). If he wants to advise her, she asks him to start with Jorah, who she’s sworn to kill if he returned. He does so…
In her cell, Cersei asks after Tommen, but the Septa just beats her with a ladle, offering her water if she confesses. Cersei tries to threaten her like last week, but just gets more ladle beatings. Qyburn visits to list the charges against her: fornication, incest, the murder of King Robert. He tells her there’s no word on Jaime, that Tommen is angsting in his room and refusing all visitors, and that Uncle Kevan is now Hand of the King, who’s refusing to visit her. Qyburn thinks her confession is the only way out, but she refuses to grovel before the Sparrow she put in power.
In Braavos, Arya is practicing a new identity for Jaqen: an orphan who worked her way from selling buckets of oysters to a cart and a place in the canal market named Lanna (not Cat of the Canals? Because that sounded cooler, but whatever, Show). She messes up and he raps her knuckles until she corrects it and gives her a mysterious mission. Someone’s ordered a hit on a ship insurance man. The Waif doesn’t think she’s ready, but Jaqen says it’s “all the same to the many-faced god.” He gave her a vial and a flash-forward shows her using it to poison the man’s oyster lunch.
In Winterfell, Sansa confronts Reek when he brings her food about tattling to Ramsay. Reek seems to think it’s better to be a safe prisoner than tortured like he was for trying to escape. “He cut away piece after piece until there was no Theon left.” Sansa bitterly says she wishes she could do it all to him for what her did to her family, her little brothers. Reek snivels that he deserves it, then accidentally confesses that Bran and Rickon escaped, that he killed two farm boys in their place.
Sansa gets some life in her and presses “Theon” to tell her where they went. “Not Theon! Reek!” he yells before shutting her in and escaping. Meanwhile, Roose and Ramsay are talking about Stannis’ chances, Roose figuring he’ll just freeze or starve or suffer mutiny if they wait him out at Winterfell. Ramsay thinks they should take the fight to Stannis.
Tyrion and Dany have lunch (and Tyrion finally gets some of his precious wine), bantering about their respective dysfunctional families. She’s got The Mad King and his sentenced him to death. “Is that why you killed him?” she asks. He promises to tell her more someday — with more wine. She says she knows her father was terrible and he counters she might be “the right kind of terrible… The kind that prevents your people from being even more so.” As awful as the fighting pits and her impending marriage are, he’s impressed by her political savvy. He reveals Varys, spy that he was, was all for Dany’s rule even if he appeared to conspire in killing her a few times. He trusts him almost as much as Jaime. She points out Jaime killed her father and disinterestedly threatens to kill Tyrion after all. Tyrion doesn’t much care.
Tyrion: I’d given up on life until Varys convinced me you might be worth living for. If you chop off my head… Well, my finals days were interesting.
She doesn’t want to kill or banish him. She wants him to advise her and stop drinking so damned much. He wonders if she should just rule here, since she’s so passionate about freeing slaves. She agrees she is. “But this is not my home.” She expects the common people of Westeros will support her. Tyrion has the support of only the common people here and it’s not enough. Most of the great houses of Westeros left in power won’t support her. Maybe the Tyrells, but it won’t be enough.
Daenerys: Lannister, Targaryen, Baratheon, Stark, Tyrell… They’re all just spokes on a wheel. This one’s on top, then that one’s on top and on and on it spins, crushing those on the ground.
Tyrion: It’s a beautiful dream, stopping the wheel. You’re not the first person that’s dreamt it.
Some men are sparring in the fighting pits in front of Jorah’s former owner when Jorah approaches, wanting another chance in the pits. He still wants Dany’s attention, even if it means being owned again.
In King’s Landing, Septa Ratched is still offering Cersei water in exchange for confessions. Cersei tries offering her money and status when she’s free or terrible death, but Septa Ratched has a fever for the flavor of CONFESS. She spills the water on the ground and leaves. Cersei tries to lap it up and makes me sad.
At The Wall, Gilly and Sam are either still dealing with the wounds of last week or they have fresh ones. Either way… awww. Olly knocks on the door with food and Gilly leaves. Olly is still angry Jon is going to save the Wildlings at Hardhome. Sam tries to tell him some Wildlings are good, but Olly doesn’t count Jon’s travelling companion Tormund among the good. Sam assures him the White Walkers are coming and they need to take this risk and make hard choices. “Try not to worry, Olly. I’ve been worrying about Jon for years. He always comes back.”
As if to say “Oh, yeah?” we cut to Jon, getting to shore with Tormund and facing the other Wildlings. One skull-wearing Wildling confronts Tormund being Jon’s prisoner, having heard of the battle and Stannis. Jon saying they are now allies doesn’t help matters. Tormund bashes the man’s skull-head in and nobody blinks. Wildlings, y’all. Later, Jon gives them a speech about how they’ll never all be pals, but they should probably work together to save their race from the White Walkers. He shows them the dragonglass, tells them they can give them land to farm and a better life if they swear to join them.
They ask after Mance and Jon confesses he killed Mance. They get riled up, but Tormund reveals that it was a mercy kill as Stannis was burning Mance alive. The Wildlings still don’t care for Jon, but they have some wary trust for Tormund, particularly a rather badass lady Wildling I’m kind of crazy about named Karsi. The Thenns don’t agree, but we all know how Wildlings feel about Thenns, so a large number of them start to load those boats to Stannis’s ships. Karsi puts her children on the boat and stays to load in the old folks. Jon is disappointed so few are joining them, but Tormund thinks the rest will come around when they see what they’re up against, but it’s too late for that. They get a pretty hefty glimpse here and now.
Jon is about to board that last boat when the Wildling dogs start freaking out. The Thenns and Wildlings shut the gates, but the Others start to break through. Some scramble for the boats and some try to fight. Jon scrambles around, torn between joining those on the ships and helping those left behind to fight. He finally gets into it.
Just taking up a third of the episode, this battle feels neverending and epic and just perfect! White Walkers watch as their rotting ice zombie minions attack! Giants (much better giants than last season’s) are swinging huge torches and stomping on zombies! Ray Harryhausen skeletons pile on! Decimated zombie children attack those who stop to feel saddened at their existence (of which poor Karsi, who seems to have a weakness for kids, is one)! The ice zombies toss themselves off distant cliffs just to get up and attack! The music is booming without being intrusive and the sounds (both ambient sounds and gory battle noises) are awesome. Have some gifs!
At one point, a pretty intimidating actual White Walker confronts Jon and pals, trying to retrieve the dragonglass. He kills all in his path and shatters their weapons. When he gets to Jon, almost running away by that point, Jon suprises him and himself when his sword doesn’t even crack. He swings it and the creature shatters to bits (Valyrian steel! What can’t it do?) as the White Walker IMDB calls The Night’s King (that one that turned the baby) looks on, kind of put out.
Jon pukes out his nerves and Edd pushes him to leave the dragonglass and go. Tormund and the giant join them when the walls fall under the horde of rotting ice zombies. They make it to the boat and row off to the ships, the giant wading behind, watching everyone left behind fall. The Night’s King doesn’t try to stop them, just stands at the end of the dock, staring icy daggers at Jon and raising his arms slowly, showing them how little their numbers matter as the dead on the shore open their now pale blue eyes, including Karsi (☹), and begin to rise, all ice zombies now.
Passing (barely) The Bechdel Test…
“The Gift” squeaks by on a weensy technicality. Cersei and Margaery’s conversation is all about squabbling over who rules Tommen. The Sandsnakes talk, but it’s mostly complaining about Bronn in the cell next door. But we do have an exchange between Cersei and the intimidating Septa Ratched about how much she’s going to kill her. As for “Hardhome,” it’s another squeaker, also thanks to Cersei/Septa Ratched.
The Women of Westeros…
Daenerys is making progress in these episodes. She’s doing things she doesn’t want to do, but with that stiff upper lip of royal duty. There’s her “break the wheel,” moment (which I adore, in case you can’t tell) which tells us she knows this is just a tiny step in her journey. It reminds me of the Sparrow’s speech about the many and the few. Danaerys does care for the smallfolk more than the other nobles of Westeros and thinks that concern will make them rally to her side. I have to wonder, though, if they’re that likely to join her, considering her family’s history. Either way, seeing her speak with Tyrion made me gleeful, even if I’d rather have had it from George R. R. Martin first.
We had very little Arya all season and that’s not my only complaint concerning her. Book thumper moment here: Why change Cat of the Canals to Lanna? I liked Cat specifically because it reminded me of Catelyn, showed me that Arya was keeping shreds of her family identity through her transformation into a faceless hitgirl. It was a small, but crucial emotional touchstone for me and I’m sad to lose it for no good reason that I can see.
As for The Waif, I haven’t talked much about her in this section. I suppose that’s mostly because I keep waffling as to whether she’s a girl or a faceless man wearing girlskin. Her interest in Arya and seeming audience with Not-Jaqen makes me think she is older than what she presents, either way.
Brienne. Shown for bare seconds in “The Gift.” Staring at an unlit tower. Waste of a perfectly good Brienne if you ask me. I hope they make up for this by the finale.
Sansa is working out well for me so far, though I wouldn’t have said so with just “The Gift.” Put together with “Hardhome”, it shows progress. She is struggling, but not giving up. Theon/Reek is the only connection she has to work with and she’s working at him. First, she tried to bolster him up and remind him who he was. When that backfired terribly, she threatened him and guilted him and the combination seemed to work. In the Book Jeyne vs. TV Sansa arena, I prefer this. Rather than Theon growing to pity and rescue Jeyne, we have Sansa forcing him to confront who he was, what he did, and who he’s become. She’s a more active force so I have hope for this arc and it possibly bringing me either the Sansa Stoneheart or the Sansa Rayder: Winterfell Invader twist on my wishlist.
I loved Olenna’s scene with The Sparrow, particularly that little moment when they commiserated on the limits of their aging bodies even more than their sparring. It was just a moment that made her seem real and relatable even under all her cool intimidation. The expansion of her character and her dialogue is one of the few things the show has over the books and I think just having her and Diana Rigg’s amazing delivery will keep me glued to this show through many tests of my loyalty.
Margaery is a bit disappointing to me right now. With the show having also expanded her, I wanted a bit more of her clever, canny smirkiness in her scenes. They’ve already hammered in that the people love Queen Margaery. The Margaery Natalie Dormer has given us could wear her prison sentence like sweet, soulful martyrdom so well. So I’m hoping the show lets her show that side and remind us why the Tyrells are such a stealthy force.
I do believe Cersei is sincere in wanting her children to be happy and safe and that this campaign against the Tyrells is all about that prophecy (younger queens and dead kids with golden shrouds and all that), but I wonder how she doesn’t see that she’s been helping that fate along. Her own paranoia has built the cell around her. I did feel a pang at seeing her desperately slurping water off the floor, though.
The Sandsnakes are still under-developed. We know Obara is pragmatic and Tyene likes to be desired as well as feared. Nymeria is still kind of a mystery. As for Ellaria, we don’t even see her in jail. As a book thumper, I keep trying to find the “Who is Arianne?” of it all and keep coming up empty. Maybe all of them are, in stages. I’d still rather have Arianne, preferably played by Aishwarya Rai.
Myrcella has more than a few lines for a change and even kind of a point. She’s been sent away and told her duty was to wed Trystane. She’s dutiful about it and, just when she finally likes it there, she’s being told it’s off. She’s in her rights to tell Uncledaddy Jaime and her mother to leave her be. It’s all a little teen angsty as arcs go, but unlike her little brother Tommen stomping around and doing nothing, she’s seeing the people around her more clearly.
I kept trying to be annoyed that they had Gilly respond to her near-rape with deciding to have sex with Sam, but I couldn’t when, throughout their scenes, they made it clear that Gilly only cared if Sam got hurt and vice versa. It made their awkward, dimly lit, not-at-all-sexy consummation something sweet and tender and innocent. I also loved her little moments with Maester Aemon.
Melisandre always did creep me out. The fact that she wants to destroy Shireen, the most perfect person in this world (on Team Sweet, that is. We all know Olenna owns Team Salty) just seals it. Kill her with fire from her precious fire god!
Alas, Karsi, we barely knew ye. It says a lot for Birgitte Hjort Sørensen that I invested in her with only a few lines and scenes and shed a tear when she opened her ice-blue zombie eyes. She was a fierce fighter with a foul mouth and a soft spot for kids and senior citizens. I wish she’d stuck around. Then again, I could have got more attached before losing her, so maybe this is for the best.
The loss of Mrs. North-Rememberton breaks my heart. The fact that she died being tortured is so egregiously wrong, yet kind of badass. Ramsay may claim her heart gave out under the threat of skinning, but I think those Northern women are tougher than that. I think she gave in to death rather than give up any more on Sansa’s allies. I’ll miss her dour face and grave delivery.
Other notes…
I wonder if, in the interest of character consolidation, Arianne’s affair with Arys Oakheart is being taken on by Bronn and Tyene.
Tyrion and Daenerys have met. I never thought the show would get this far ahead of the books. I’m a little bummed out because I’d like my first experience of this long-awaited moment to be through the book and, let’s face it, GRRM’s superior writing rather than the show’s. Maybe that’s unfair. I do appreciate some of the moments the show has given us and some of the added dialogue has been epic as well. And I like a lot of the character expansion, particularly of the Tyrell women. But now they seem to be rushing ahead of the story that’s there. There is plenty of plot to be had without rushing things along.
That being said, I’m still resolving to accept the show is its own entity. Doesn’t mean it’s not a struggle. I was thinking they killed off Ser Barristan so Jorah could take his moments, but maybe that’s what they’ll have Tyrion do. I confess, I think this will be better than him boating around and poking his toes to check for greyscale like in the books, but I still would have liked to have read his first scene with Dany before seeing it here.
Fangasms ...
On a fangirl note, I really enjoyed the Tyrion/Dany scenes, so I don’t know why I’m complaining.
That battle! Nuff said!
Next up: “The Dance of Dragons.”
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