The Wit and Wisdom of Carrie Fisher
It seems like, since we lost Carrie, everyone wants to make sure you know she was more than Princess Leia… and I suppose I am no exception.
“I have to start by telling you that my entire existence could be summed up in one phrase. And that is: if my life wasn’t funny it would just be true, and that is unacceptable.” — Wishful Drinking, 2008
Much like Carrie herself, there are many layers to why we’ll miss her. She was more than an actress. She was a screenwriter, a script doctor, a novelist, an advocate, a fascinating story-teller, and probably one of the most quotable people of our time — along the lines of Oscar Wilde or Dorothy Parker, but slightly more intimate and specific.
“There is no point at which you can say, ‘Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap.’” — Wishful drinking
“The crew was mostly men. That’s how it was and that’s pretty much how it still is. It’s a man’s world and show business is a man’s meal, with women generously sprinkled through it like an overqualified spice.” — The Princess Diarist
If there is an interview where she didn’t crack the host up, I have yet to find it. But it wasn’t just her sharp sense of humor that made her compelling, there was wisdom, experience, and pain behind it.
“I suspect that no matter what happens I will allow it to hurt me. Eat away at my insides, as it were — as it will be. As it always has been. Why am I so accessible? Why do I give myself to people who will always and should always remain strangers? I have always relied on the cruelty of strangers and I must stop it now.” ― The Princess Diarist
Her lack of vanity was so refreshing, especially for someone who not only worked in Hollywood, but grew up in it. She was always self-deprecating, self-aware, and able to cut through the B.S. like no other.
“We treat beauty like an accomplishment, and that is insane. Everyone in L.A. says, ‘Oh, you look good,’ and you listen for them to say you’ve lost weight. It’s never ‘How are you?’ or ‘You seem happy!’ “ — Good Housekeeping, 2015
“I’m not happy about being older, except what are the options?” — Rolling Stone, 2016
“They don’t want to hire all of me — only about three-quarters! Nothing changes, it’s an appearance-driven thing. I’m in a business where the only thing that matters is weight and appearance. That is so messed up. They might as well say get younger, because that’s how easy it is.” — Good Housekeeping, 2015
“Celebrity is just obscurity biding its time. — Wishful Drinking
She had a perspective on celebrity culture, on living under the scrutiny of the public, and on the inescapability of being defined by an iconic role.
“I am Princess Leia, no matter what. If I were trying to get a good table, I wouldn’t say I wrote Postcards. Or, if I’m trying to get someone to take my check and I don’t have ID, I wouldn’t say: “Have you seen Harry Met Sally?” Princess Leia will be on my tombstone.” — WebMD, 2010
“What I didn’t realize, back when I was this 25-year-old pinup for geeks… was that I had signed an invisible contract to stay looking the exact same way for the next 30 to 40 years. Well, clearly I’ve broken that contract.” — Shockaholic, 2011
“I like Princess Leia. I like how she handles things. I like how she treats people. She tells the truth. She, you know, gets what she wants done. I don’t have a real problem with Princess Leia. I’ve sort of melded with her over time.” — Fresh Air, 2016
Her frankness and complete transparency about her struggles with bipolar disorder, substance abuse, her love life, family life, and self-esteem were also rare in an industry that tells people to hide their struggles and present their lives as perfect.
“Because I grew up in a public family, I never really had a private life. And so if those issues are going to be public, I would rather them to be public the way I’ve experienced them rather than someone else assuming things about me. It’s freeing to do it. Shame is not something I aspire to.” — CBC, 2016
“I think I’m very sane about how crazy I am.” — Wishful Drinking
“Well, what are the choices? The choices are dying, so you just have to get to the other side of it. I was always able to trust there was one. And I don’t know why I thought that.” — Rolling Stone, 2016
And, of course, her relationship with her mother, Debbie Reynolds, the entire story of how they came to be the constant companions they were in the end, is touching and inspirational.
“If anything, my mother taught me how to sur-thrive. That’s my word for it. She would go through these amazingly difficult things, and the message was clear: Doing the impossible is possible. It’s just not fun.” — The New York Times, 2010
“She broke her ankle one night during a performance and went back onstage and sang ‘Tammy’ with her foot in a bucket of ice. She should be put on that thing with the four presidents — Mount Rushmore. Right after Teddy Roosevelt, but have his eyes looking down at her cleavage.”– New York Times, 2010
If you haven’t watched HBO’s Bright Lights, which follows Carrie and Debbie through several events over the last few years, I highly recommend it. It put me in mind, in the best possible way, of Grey Gardens.
While Big Edie and Little Edie Beale lived in near-isolation, Carrie and Debbie lived in the Hollywood fish bowl, but their situations share certain qualities: they love to collect things, they almost enjoy complaining about each other, and there is that feeling that no one understands them quite like the other. There’s something beautiful about mothers and daughters who choose to live their lives in close proximity to each other and, morbid as it sounds, about two people being so close that they pass away within a day of each other. I could (and still might) write a couple thousand words about that dynamic, but I’ll just leave you for now with yet another of Carrie’s many quotes to live by…
“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” ― Wishful Drinking
************
Images used are not property of Legendary Women and are used here for illustration only.
Love what you read? Want to follow us closer to get all the latest Legendary Women news? Then sign up for our monthly newsletter and also our Medium collection. And don’t forget to follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr.
