The Feeling of Coming Home
or musings from my human Laurie Holmes
As human beings, we have a vivid imagination that has both helped us and hindered us through time.
When I ponder the feeling of coming home, a memory surfaces, and I am taken back to when my brother was a newborn, and I was 7 years old.
My mom was rocking and nursing him in his room, my grandma was sitting next to her, and I was looking out the side window and we were singing together. I don’t remember the song, but I do remember the feeling. It was warm and nurturing, and loving and light. I wanted to be that baby again, wrapped in my mother’s arms, sucking at her breast, warm sweet milk flowing down my throat, while being rocked, cuddled, and sung to.
That feeling is indescribable as it was before words came along. I have glimpses of total sensations, It was pure presence without interpretation. In this space, I was totally set free from the limitations of my thinking mind. I was pure elemental feeling.
It is akin to floating in the water without anything to hold on to. You just Are. I imagine the spiritual world is something like that, full presence or consciousness without form to drag it down, all sensations flowing through at once, without attachment to any. A total sense of freedom, peace, and love. I experienced that very feeling at 7, in that room, singing, and being in the presence of love.
In this reality, I return to it when I release my personal thinking and tap into the ever-present feeling of coming home.
People have asked me as a coach, how can I do that? How do I stop thinking so I can be present? There is no answer to that question, as there is no how-to involved. As a child I did nothing to have that experience, I was just fully aware in every moment without judgment, I was free to be me. I just floated on the sea of sensations, fully aware and fully present to what was flowing through me. I may have stayed in that state for a few minutes or a few hours, as time is irrelevant there. While in the present moment, time ceases to exist, it is only when the thinking mind returns that we are aware of time again.
“A quiet mind is a wonder to experience,
. a stillness that vibrates with the energy
. of a thousand stars.
A feeling that is more spacious than an ocean,
. and more specific than a baby’s breath
. upon your heart.
. The quieter your mind becomes,
. the easier to access the wisdom within.
“ Be still and know that I Am God,”
. will speak to you again. — my first published poem, 2014.
Imagine for a minute that you are untethered. from what you identify as; your personality and your ego. What is possible then when everything is possible? Would you feel free, unencumbered by societal expectations or personal expectations? Who would you be then?
I have worked with many gorgeous human beings over the past 40 years as my spiritual wisdom has grown. So many stories of people suffering from what their thinking mind has conjured up. I am always in awe of the innocence in seeing them, not see their own magnificence. Once they tap into that truth for themselves a natural transformation occurs. I have seen eyes open wide as the dawn of truth registers in their entire being. Laughter spills out when they see the stories they innocently made up. Joy leaps from their essence and they experience the quieting of the personal mind. I love being in the presence of someone returning home inside themself. It is truly an honor to witness the flowering of the human spirit, and know that the only problems we have are the ones in our imagination! Namaste🙏
