What Can a Relationship Ultimatum Do for Your Partnership?

Before I delve into what brings a relationship to its final moments or closing a turbulent chapter for a new beginning, I want to pause. Here’s why. My writing tends to make simplicity complicated. Frequently, my words get in the way of my meaning. It has happened before and is likely to happen again.

Sharing hopeful ideas are merely one part of the meaning. Receptively from the yonder side is essential for its purpose to unfold.

Here’s my drift. A while ago, I was facilitating weekly relationship groups. These groups had terrific success. The participants would arrive with doubts and leave with glee. Some couples attended one session, finding sufficient support to reunite. For the participants that wanted more, they attended several sessions. In either case, these folks found clarity at the pace of their curiosity and insight.

A Bond Stronger than Blood

The relationship group had consistent results in illuminating possibilities. The focus centered on the participants’ experiences and how to move through the muck. My stories were the starter for discussion of what makes obstacles real and the source of restoring relationship unity. Mostly, it gave the couples an opportunity for conscious reflection.

The reflective moments gave them some distance from the entanglements sufficiently to view the scene from a new perspective. Notably, it shed light on how the mind creates both discord and togetherness. One wondrous discovery was how these opposing avenues had the potential to merge into understanding, thereby strengthening the relationship’s well-being.

Ultimately, insights emerged from each couple, rather than from my expertise or by examining the challenges. It was about discovering wisdom in the moment. With wisdom unfolding, the couples began realizing the driving force that led them into a brick wall or sailing their way towards a new horizon.

Some of my anecdotal stories resonated, and some of them fell short. Overall, the power of these sessions came from the participants.

Much of my humor in the group had a dry, gritty undistinguishable wit. Evidently, I wasn’t the catalyst for restoring relationship wellness. Instead, each participant brought the spirit of what changes they were ready to mend for themselves. Hence, the ethereal glue that bonds relationships mended the course. It rises from an inside glimmer and grows from there onward.

A Leap of Thought

After my fumbling attempts at describing the function of consciousness, a couple salvaged my blunder. They heard something in my garblings and transformed it into a recognizable sample for the group.

Listening to them, I heard a description of the impersonal self before the perceptible self. The participants’ example showed how conclusive thinking is nothing more than a bold reach for relationship well-being.

The story began with birds caring for their brood. The Mama and Papa had their respective roles. It was what their parents and their grandparents did before them. Yet, somehow, this formula wasn’t working. They tried everything. While arguing, the birds blamed one another. Then, the birds blamed the custom. Finally, after a long exhausting day, the pair started wondering where the tradition came from. The two whirled their feathers. In an instant, both realized that their thinking about the traditional stuff was producing their grief!

The bird’s story unfolded further as another participant chimed in. Here’s what I remembered.

That evening, Mama and Papa settled in for a restful night. While sleeping, each had the same inexplicable dream. In this rare occurrence, the Mama and Papa bird could see one another’s spirits before birth.

Becoming life, they observed the transition from seeing themselves as spirits into seeing themselves as birds. Once accepting the bird world, they lived as birds along with their fellow birdies. Ultimately, their ethereal senses drifted into the rhythms of time-space and matter.

Soon, it became time for them to leave their respective nests. They explored distant places above the terrain. In a moment of exploring, they saw one another and fell in love. Then, the Mama and Papa birds awoke to a new morning full of chirping songs.

The Divine Nature of Healthy Relationships

After a few years of facilitating relationship groups, I learned a bunch. Here is a sampling.

There are many paths toward healthy relationships, and they merge with lovingness. Once you sense the source of sacred abundance, suffering fades, and healing grows into well-being. Aiming beyond conclusive thinking gives love a chance to unfold.

Why fabricate ideas into problems or incompatibilities? Why not listen for empathetic understanding, or listen for the love signs of attraction? Holding onto the ideas of unworthiness distorts the pure nature of our spirit. It is a common struggle. It places extrapolated factors above living potential. Such a predicament is likely the result of a multi-generational wound searching for healing.

While ineffectual thinking can permeate on many levels, it dissolves with the strongest solvent on earth, l o v e. No one is born with an incomplete spirit. However, living in this human world, eventually, the messaging sinks into realism.

Call it what it is. We’ve become accustomed to imposing limitations onto ourselves and all around us. But why not shower ourselves with the ordinary gifts of our holy abilities? Nobody is unique, but everyone is sacred. Engaging divine guidance shifts the trajectory of our lives and our relationships from darkness into light. It is love-consciousness.

There isn’t a moment of living where our innate intelligence shuts off. It is fully operational 24/7. Surely, divine guidance realigns us from our core. Each loving step we make naturally illuminates how holding on to faulty messaging, such as guilt, shame, and doubts, projects a haze over life’s sacred experience. Could pitfalls be a necessity for understanding our pure authenticity?

Restoring the spiritual homeostasis begins with inner sight. It is a path of universal proportions, and we are already on this path of endless discovery. Hence, it brings to the surface our innate senses which make interconnecting, intimacy, and completeness possible. It is oneness-a sense of sacred unity.

Love Flows Like a River

Our only choice on earth is holding on and letting go. It has been an inside-out cadence into existence before the dawn of time-space and matter. Many generations ago, the ancient ones cast their worries down the river and placed their hopes upstream. It was the symbolic ritual of ancestorial consciousness.

Consciousness is the energy that makes stuff happen. Thinking our way into the physical is what we do. In this sense, by manifesting relationship togetherness, it appears into existence. The idea here is, perception has an origin before its formation. The energy of the Mind is a way to describe this universal source. The sacred soul is another. Whichever words or artifacts are chosen, they reference the same source.

In relationships, the common denominator is love consciousness. It defies the laws of science because it isn’t measurable. Consciousness is invisible. What is measurable is the multitude of its expressions. Some of these expressions have become mythologized, and some forgotten.

Sure, ethereal energy produces stuff, such as thinking. And, it can temporarily impede partnership. Like a river, these moments wash out to the great ocean for purification. Each relationship is more than its problems. Often, a relationship disconnect is a product of patterns and programming that often escapes cognition. Recognizing it can be uncomfortable, and it can also be the first step to allowing it to pass downstream.

When a relationship stumbles upon a problem, it is an opportunity to disengage the burden. Then it can transform and restore the directional cadence towards growth and intimacy. Once re-realignment happens, everything changes.

Change in our world doesn’t come from famous people, monumental places, or shiny things. Instead, it unfolds at the moment of readiness from within the spirit. As it radiates into our physical realm, it echoes far into the universe.

Momentary Reflection

When smartness gets in my way, it’s time for something else to lead. So, if my words have gotten murky, I hope you can find a clearing. I genuinely want the sacred love to flow like a river and let love win!

Even in the relationship group, surrounded by insightful vibes, skepticism arose. I heard, “We’ve been arguing for months. How is this group going to mend that?!” Truthfully, the group led itself. My facilitation was primarily listening. Somehow, person-centered listening gave grounding to the group and had a natural calming effect.

As the facilitator, I would tune out from my inner thought channels and tune in to listening with heart-consciousness. The participants already had their own sense of grounding. So, it was a merging-together thing. In the calm, subtle insights became amplified, and it reduced the emotional turmoil between partners to its right size. Eventually, the couple’s wisdom would wash over the group like a spa treatment at an all-inclusive resort. The caring and sharing of the group would fill the room with loving intelligence. It was an invisible sensory reverberation.

Sometimes, the grounding would stir, and we got caught up again. Given reflective pause, it would pass and simmer into an appreciation for life’s ebb and flow. Each couple had a story of facing challenges that would bring tears and chills. It was amazing how loving strength keeps relationships intact. Maturing relationships have incredible wisdom, and I am forever in awe of the powerful glue love gives to partnerships.

There were many gems. One participant noted, “If you continue to see yourself as broken, then you won’t see the potential.” It was an insight that defectiveness was a projection preparing for healing. Each couple wanted well-being and recognizing blind spots cleared a path. Whatever the issue, seeing beyond it revealed the potential of love again.

Into the Divine Ocean, We Go!

Much of the insecurity experienced in life has roots in social programming. Similar to the story of the spirit thinking it is a bird, we often think we are our roles in relationships. Clearly, we are more than our roles; the energy within the person is the lovable center.

Wherever we go, the sacred origin is within us. It makes togetherness possible while dashing away the illusionary idea of separation. So with a leap of faith, this universe can become holy, and thus everything in it. In this sense, there is clearly God or Goddess energy to this cosmos, which is forever pure and ethereal, moving into the real.

Special Note:

In my view, life is sacred. With it, I make a diligent reach towards well-being from the inside. In many ways, this is the same for everyone. Yet, even as I know well-being is already within my spirit, life isn’t about my ‘good feeling’ as much as it is about participating in oneness.

Here’s my interpretative observation of life’s meaning and purpose.

It seems, that all of us on this earthly plane, and likely the life beyond our solar system, are exploring love. While I view love consciousness as a profound song, we can also be frightened of it. “There is no cure for love” is a slogan for locking love away from its expression. However, survival itself is love-infused. We might obscure it from cognition, but love motivates almost every aspect of our daily grind. Most recently, it includes AI and technological unification. We could criticize these modern processes as contaminated love, but without love, motivation itself would be non-existent. Love makes everything happen.

Every idea is an attempt to bring love into the present moment. While we consider some efforts inhumane, there are some that are worthy of a Noble Peace Prize. Whichever the approach, everyone forms this world and universe by the deeds of love.

For me, love is a profound gift far beyond the illusiveness of peace. Of course, I welcome peaceful feelings, but I find the concept to be illusionary.

What Is Love Consciousness?

Awareness of love’s healing energy is an inner sight. For me, it arose from severe traumas, such as cyclical intimate abuse. There were also near ethereal life experiences (NLE) that dissolved my human condition altogether. From these experiences, my spirit began letting go of uncompromising thoughts for heart-centering forgiveness. When I resist less and accept more, I find well-being in almost every feeling, including emotional turbulence. Ultimately, there isn’t a difference between this life and the next because consciousness is a continuum.

Correlatively, our human dissonance reveals itself as suffering. Some philosophies refer to these as spiritual poisons, such as greed, anger, and ignorance. When love restores, these poisons become generosity, compassion, and wisdom. Of course, this example is about classical ideas of transformation. It is an introspective thought via the gift of consciousness.

Is stressful thinking our enemy? In a popular TED Talk by Kelly McGonigal, stress is friendly . It posits that physiological responses engage positively when a person thinks stress is beneficial. In contrast, the flight, fight or freeze responses muck it up. The only difference is perception. When the gift of thought aligns, love wins.

Rather than teaching a conclusive point, I hope to present an idea of a loving core. Here is another variation. Love is a singular motivator of the sacred universe.

Every thought, be it insight or wisdom, is an expansion of love’s core. Each miserable emotion, including sadness and fear, is love’s expression into a blind end. No one seeks suffering because it is a blind spot-the dissonance of a divine dream state. Seeking happiness or a ‘good feeling’ is like seeking love from its byproduct. Alas, these are just ideas.

Often, the living path seeks love from the outside world, and to the best of my memory, it hasn’t happened yet. The spirit of life isn’t on the outside. Instead, it nestles itself within the heart of consciousness. Everyone discovers and unfolds love. There are many paths, and each leads to the same transformation. Love gently melts separation into oneness. An ever-unfolding, inexplicable phenomenon.

Reflections on Divine Love

Originally published at https://ericzuniga.com on July 11, 2022.