The reasons I don’t write.
My self inflicted frustration is mounting with my inability to commit to writing regularly. I know I enjoy it. I have lots of interests and things I want to write about and comment on but I can’t seem to commit.
This post is a therapeutic, unscientific exercise in identifying some of the reasons why I am hesitating. I’ll attempt to dispel these reasons so I can move forward.
So without further ado (I definitely had to look up ado vs. adieu), on with the listicle.
1. Fear of not meeting my own expectations.
I have always had this idea in the back of my mind that I would be good at writing. I felt like I have a voice that is thoughtful and entertaining.
The beauty of rarely writing anything is that I never have to be proven wrong about that.
This fear in general is probably the biggest obstacle. Fear of the unknown, fear of the response and just in general, being a wimp. It may end up rendering the remainder of the list irrelevant. But whatever. This is an exercise.
2. It feels lame.
Again this probably goes along with fear. In that I am afraid that someone I respect might see a post and think less of me for something I wrote.
Not necessarily because they disagreed with my opinions but because they thought the idea of blogging seemed lame. Which might be my default reaction, too, even though I thoroughly enjoy most blogs I read.
Even this post feels like such a millennial thing to do.
Let me whine about all the reasons I am afraid to write a blog that no one will read.
3. Time.
Admittedly, this is by far the weakest excuse. I waste plenty of time. I read the same articles about productivity on medium over and over while procrastinating on either doing something actually productive or writing something of my own.
So I am keeping this in even though I know it isn’t a valid excuse.
4. I don’t know what to write about.
I have always loved reading about running and writing up race reports but that feels like it doesn’t capture my full interests.
I guess going back to fear. Maybe I am afraid my expertise is a mile wide and an inch deep?
My opinions are formed from podcasts, surface level conversations and skimming article headlines. Would I just be contributing to the white noise?
It probably doesn’t matter.
I imagine doing a bit of research might beef things up. If I want to actually commit to this process, some time investment may be necessary.
5. I guess I am out of excuses.
To distill it down, I think it is mostly a combination of reasons 1 and 2. I guess I’d rather not embarrass myself with something I am messing around with.
But the bottom line is, who cares? No one is forced to read this and I know I like doing it.
The commitment.
I can commit to writing one post per week. I think that seems reasonable. I imagine it will be a combination of commentary, links to things I am enjoying and I have really wanted to figure out an interview series with people I find interesting. I’ll shoot for Monday postings.
So with all that being said. I’m ready. (This counts as this week’s post, right?)
