Being Shakti

Emerging the leader within

For ages now,I have appreciated and been awed by the immense power and the natural leadership abilities of women. Since my childhood, I would see my mother who was a simple working woman, work her way tirelessly through the day — waking up early in the morning, finishing off her exercise regimes, lovingly preparing the day’s meals for the entire family, singlehandedly dressing me and my little sister for school, giving instructions to the maid for the day, completing all the tit bit household chores and rushing off to work. And in the evenings, running through the same set of tasks after a tiring day at work with the addition of helping us with our studies, homework, serving dinner, doing the dishes and finally retiring off to bed, yet with a smile.

As I grew up, I was fortunate to work with women bosses, all of whom I saw exhibited the same tireless energy that I saw in my mother. During my holiday visits to our village, I would see the rural women also go through their days with the same kind of energy and enthusiasm, doing much more physically demanding work than their urban counterparts — waking up earlier, cooking for larger families, adhering to the conservative village traditions, politely serving elders in the family, helping in the fields, milking the buffaloes etc. etc. and yet managing to greet every single person with a smile that would radiate love and innocence. I am sure that this is not alien at all especially in the Indian culture. Even in this modern day and age, my guess is that more than 90% of the readers of this article would very well be able to relate to the above description of the tireless natural leaders, that they have all seen mostly in their own homes and have been fortunate to have been mentored or brought up by one of them. From grandmothers, to mothers, to mothers in law, to sisters, to aunties, to daughters and daughters in law — they all have an amazingly natural capacity to lead. As we celebrate Women’s Day today, my head bows down in respect and gratitude to all the women in the world, as I open my heart to say ‘Vande Mataram’!

The reason women are natural leaders is because it is this very energy of love, enthusiasm, selfless sacrifice and tireless service (whether paid or voluntary or out of love) that keeps and holds things, people, families, their emotions and organizations together. Imagine a world or a household without women. The very thought takes away the aliveness and makes everything look dead. I often wondered — what is it that makes women so incredible. Not only am I proud to be one myself, but I am also keen to re — connect and touch base with the core feminine energy within me that gives me the motivation and spirits to walk through life in the most graceful & dignified manner.

Our identities as ‘males’ or ‘females’ are decided based on the costumes we take during birth. We are all souls, conscious beings of energy that take the physical costume of a male or female. Hence this is not to say that one costume (in this case female) is better than the other. The aim of spirituality is to unite and to make whole, to integrate into oneness whilst being aware and appreciating the differences.

Balancing Masculine & Feminine Energies — Living from Wholeness

Psychologically and biologically, men and women are wired differently. However on a spiritual level, the soul is whole, and there exists a masculine and feminine energy within each one of us. It is the balance of both these energies — the yin and yang that make us whole beings.

Our education system and much of the exposure we have today is catered towards nurturing and developing the masculine energy in us. The masculine energy and qualities are associated with the left brain specific functions that allow us to think logically, analyze critically and solve problems based on logic and reasoning. Whereas the feminine energy is about activating the right brain that stimulates creativity, embraces abstract ideas and connects deeply on an emotional level.

While our education and much of our formal training and work experience usually strengthens the left brain functions, spirituality activates the right brain functions and our intuitive abilities. “If ever the world sees a time when women shall come together purely and simply for the benefit and good of mankind, it will be a power that the world has never known,” said Helen. E. Fisher in her famous book ‘The Natural Leadership Talents of Women’. In a spiritual context, this would mean a time when each one of us awakens our feminine energies to the fullest would be the time when the entire mankind would benefit, thus making it the most powerful and transformational time. It would be a world where our energies are in perfect balance, a harmonious world, where the beings live and function through an elevated consciousness, through wholeness. It is thus, no utopia that such a perfect world, the Golden age or new era of humanity would become a reality.

I believe that we are on the threshold of such an era. It is therefore time for all of us to sit back, reflect, spend a few moments deeply appreciating the role this feminine energy has played in our lives — be it through a male or a female body, and consider re — connecting with that untapped energy within ourselves. It can be done through consciously being aware of our actions and by intentionally making an effort to inculcate the feminine qualities of leadership in our daily lives.

Here are a few qualities to begin with, that will completely change the way we respond to our world & situations and thus change our lives forever.

1. Intuition — The Webster dictionary defines Intuition as ‘the power or faculty of attaining to direct knowledge or cognition without evident rational thought and inference’. The word ‘Intuition’ literally means ‘In’ ‘Tuition’ — the tutor within. It is the natural intelligence of the self that is awakened when the mind is silent. It is the inner voice that knows. The intuition is active in the state of presence. Intuitive decisions are often made spontaneously, in a state of awareness and take into consideration what is most needed in the moment. Intuitiveness is a feminine quality and a very important leadership trait. To awaken the inner voice, start with practicing to constantly silence the mind. After every 2 to 3 hours of work, pause for a few seconds, and just become aware of the present moment. Stay put in this state of presence for a couple of minutes before getting back to ‘doing’ again. Eventually the thinking mind can be silenced at will, thus awakening the intuition.
2. Emotional Maturity — The ability to handle varied emotions with a detached and stable state of mind is called emotional maturity. Though women are usually highly emotional, studies suggest that because they express their emotions freely, they are relatively much more emotionally stable than most men. A powerful feminine energy, this, if awakened, can work wonders in our relationships and our ability to influence them as leaders. An emotionally mature individual is completely able to relate and connect to people on an emotional level and is totally ‘involved’ yet is unaffected and ‘detached’. This secures us from getting carried away by emotions and allows us to think clearly even during turbulent times. For instance, the mother who is detached and yet involved will be able to emotionally lift and counsel her child when he/she is feeling low. A mother with a low level of emotional maturity would tend to get emotionally affected when she sees her child suffering. Likewise, a corporate leader who is emotionally mature will be able to think clearly and listen to his intuition even during crisis, as compared to his counterpart who has a low emotional quotient. This quality can be awakened by practicing to remain detached in situations. Understanding and recognizing that we are just conscious beings of energy playing different roles and NOT the role itself, helps cultivate detachment. Also, acknowledging the eternal truth that nothing is permanent helps us mature emotionally. Meditation is key to developing emotional maturity.
3. Vulnerability — This is probably one of the purest and most attractive feminine virtues. Just as a child is innocent and vulnerable and hence very attractive, similarly, being vulnerable helps us be our true selves without having to always wear a mask. Vulnerability in leadership is highly respected as it takes courage and spiritual strength to be vulnerable and honest. A conscious practice to become aware of the moments we tend to mask our true identities and pretend to be something that we are not, is what is needed. It is a good thing to practice being vulnerable with our family members and close friends for a start. We will soon realize the immense power that this simple virtue has and eventually awaken it fully.
4. Patience — Another immensely powerful feminine quality, and probably one of the most needed one in the present times is Patience. Supreme patience comes almost naturally to most women as they begin to shoulder higher responsibilities, especially those connected with child bearing and rearing. However, the root to patience is the eternal wisdom that — There is a time for everything. Nothing comes to us before it is destined to, no matter how hard we try. Also, every situation in life — whether good or bad will pass. This understanding helps awaken patience which in turn bears sweet fruit. A patient and tolerant leader has a much higher ability to persevere and hence attracts success naturally.
5. Accommodation — Just like an ocean accommodates all rivers and streams flowing into it, an accommodating heart is like an ocean — big, warm and generous. The power to accommodate is an important leadership quality that enables us to empathize and respect everyone and everything around us. It is a power that allows us to accept everyone as they are, even if we do not necessarily agree with them. Acceptance is the first step to inspiring others to change. This inherent and untapped power can be awakened by consciously practicing to accept everyone around us. Appreciating their specialties is a good way to facilitate acceptance. This also comes with the eternal wisdom that ‘We cannot change anyone but ourselves’. As an experiment, let us begin with our family members or our team at work. Think of each one and appreciate their specialties. Look at them as eternal conscious beings with certain human traits just like every other human on this earth. Slowly and gradually accept them for who they are and just for a while try seeing things from their perspective. Very soon we will find ourselves being able to accommodate those around us and our hearts will expand to embrace and give more.