Feelings, Thoughts, and a Waking Blackout
Perfect time to relax while the doctors work around the clock.
Do you remember the getaways? Do you recall the journeys so morbid and yet so fragile?
Maybe you never had those journeys
Maybe you only had feelings, thoughts, and a waking blackout
If I really were there when I travelled the dark freeways with you, interstate;
Stopping at gas stations and burger joints on a one thousand mile drive,
would I still be up at nights thinking about those days?
And so I wasn’t there,
only my feelings, thoughts, and a waking blackout
Based on what I remember, I justify this un-ending dialogue I have with myself inside my head
I fancy those days just like a movie scene that I just cannot forget
I try one hundred ways and alternate endings to our story
I try millions of permutations of events on that highway’s love affair
I try and imagine your billion moods given away by the shape of your feather-touch smirk and the inclination of your heels
“Quite observant!”, you’d say. “It annoys you, don’t lie,” I’d reply
But we travelled on, for one thousand miles on a dark highway,
with only my feelings, thoughts, and a waking blackout
And somewhere there, along the highway, I lost that perfect moment
The moment that could have changed my life
A life that was already changed
As it changes every day
It just doesn’t change as we want it to
When all we have is our thoughts, feelings, and a waking blackout
